an 1881 novel written by mary shelley. arguably one of the earliest known works of science fiction and the origin point for one of fiction's greatest monsters, nobody has read it, because there's a more popular movie.

the plot concerns an obsessive doctor who believes he can synthesize his own life form, but upon doing so, he fails to raise it properly, leading to a very bad wedding, an expedition to the north pole, and many ponderous philosophical arguments.

differences from the source material: in the book, the monster was motivated by revenge outright, and was pretty chatty. since the 1931 movie, people have thought of frankenstein's monster as a voiceless, child-brained hulk who doesn't fully realize the consequences of his own actions.

to be absolutely clear, the monster is not named frankenstein. the monster is never given a name. but we can call him dave, if you like. in any case he is widely acknowledged as one of the all-time groovy ghoulies, like dracula and the wolf man

(n.) a shaggy, garishly-dressed, drugged up young person who spends his time zoned out of his mind in some kind of psychedelic rock concert and protesting the general state of things and stuff

they were a major source of parental alarm in the 60s and 70s until they were replaced by, oh, let's say punks

The method employed by one's opponents in baffling one's open and honorable efforts to do the right thing.
So plain the advantages of machination

---

It constitutes a moral obligation,
And honest wolves who think upon't with loathing
Feel bound to don the sheep's deceptive clothing.
So prospers still the diplomatic art,
And Satan bows, with hand upon his heart.
—R.S.K.

(noun): A game that's easy to learn but impossible to master, causing losers to hate it and winners to lord their superiority over everyone else. Just don't knock over the pieces in a fit of rage.

(american) an american variation of football, refined to have even more complicated rules so that the on-field action becomes even more slow and excruciating. while nobody in recorded history actually knows how this game is played, and americans are too embarrassed to admit it, it seems to involve large men trying to dogpile each other while a pig's bladder is thrown out of bounds.

noun/bi nɑt əˈfreɪd/

I mean, the Bible. Here we explore the mysteries of the universe, from the creation of the heavens and the earth to the existence of biblically accurate angels.

Now, biblically accurate angels are not your run-of-the-mill winged creatures. They're more like fiery-eyed, sword-wielding badasses who deliver messages of hope and comfort to humanity. And when they say "be not afraid," they mean it - you'd better listen up.

But how do these intimidating beings manage to be so comforting? Well, it's all in their demeanor. You see, biblically accurate angels have been around for thousands of years, and they've had plenty of time to perfect the art of making humans feel at ease.

It's a delicate balance, really. On one hand, you want to inspire awe and reverence in the humans you're talking to. On the other hand, you don't want to scare them half to death. That's where the "be not afraid" comes in - it's a reassurance that everything is going to be okay, even if you're talking to a creature with eyes like fire.

Of course, not everyone is comforted by the presence of an angel. Some people would rather stick their heads in the sand than face the reality of a sword-wielding messenger from on high. But for those who are willing to listen, the words "be not afraid" can be a powerful reminder that there is always hope, even in the darkest of times.

So, if you ever find yourself face to face with a biblically accurate angel, don't panic. Take a deep breath, look them in the eye (if you can), and remember - "be not afraid." It might just be the best advice you'll ever get.

marcus antonious (83-30 BC) is a dead roman guy.

once a sidekick to julius caesar, whom he served faithfully as a general but also humiliated a few times by routinely turning up to the senate pig-bastard drunk (this got him into a pissing match with cicero).

when julius kicked the bucket, marc took over as big cheese and set to work thrashing his old master's assassins. however, he was beaten to the punch by (augustus caesar), the adopted son of the late caesar, who managed to take control of rome while marcy went skulking around the eastern world looking for allies. this led marc antony to shack up with cleopatra vii, with whom he had a torrid love affair. this sordid romance came to an end when marc antony's armies were well and truly smashed in actium, and he committed suicide to escape octavian's reprisal.

a dead british guy named william shakespeare wrote a little ditty about it.

(n.) 1) having desirable and admirable masculine characteristics. 2) having contemptible and detestable masculine characteristics.

more theen one cat
(also: cat)

n. A gift from one who is legging it out of this vale of tears.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

an aphrodisiac given to someone else to override their romantic will

a misunderstood free system of exchange that helps you move to the big city and get vaccinated on schedule

a process of converting someone to a specific belief, perspective, or series of behavior processes. These methods vary by culture, and by government. an ancient alien race known as the reapers may or may not be the originators of these complex and multi-faceted techniques of behavior (and thought) modification.

(also: military)
(also: minecraft)

(n.)(also: problem)

n. One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a nation invented in 1871
(also: Prussia)

(n.) something meant to be sat upon. one of those modern conveniences that are thankfully easy to improvise in times of shortage

Something given in expectation of something better. Today's payment for to-morrow's service.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) an art and storytelling medium that consists of moving images projected onto a screen. historically followed the same trend as all art forms: "this art form will never catch on," "this art form isn't as good as the art forms we had in my day," "this art form was better when i was growing up," and "not enough porn"

(adj.) in exchange for having done something important and then died