(n.) a celebration held on the day of one's birth meant to congratulate them on not biting the big one yet (see death).

(1879 – 1955) German/ US scientist discovered Theory of Relativity.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: albert einstein quotes)

Advanced form of Karen. Karen police behavior of others and would call on managers and police but an Amber Heard is spiteful and would staged lies to sabotage their victims and would magically have friends who believe her regardless of evidence. She has the charms and use it deceptively

(noun, fem) refers to the Devil himself; Satan; comes straight from hell to cause misery and pain; will enter your life and make it 100 times worse, then will take your kids and don't even let you visit them; Why don't you let me see the kids Rachel, I think the agreement on the divorce papers was that I get to see the kids at least twice in a week, but no, you have to complicate everything, like you did in our marriage, and. that's why we broke up in the first place! Please at least let me see them, I miss them so much

(n.) the act of putting something off until... ah screw it

(n.) the late-night movie that plays within one's head while one is in the throes of sleep. a typical dream is likely to be some combination of unfocused, deranged, erotic, and terrifying.

a goodly amount of folklore surrounds the act of dreaming, with some believing them to be tinged with prophetic foresight or symbolic inner meaning. this is difficult to reconcile with the sheer weight of dreams of an erotic nature, since we all know that shit just ain't happening.

the everly brothers assure you that, should they want you and your charms in their arms, they may achieve this state of affairs within their dreams

(also: nightmare), for dreams that are scary
(also: wet dream), for dreams that are... wet.

(also: earth)

(1451 – 1504) Queen of Castille, who helped create a powerful and unified state of Spain whose influence spread to the Americas.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: queen isabella i quotes)

No longer used by the timid. Said chiefly of words. A word which some lexicographer has marked obsolete is ever thereafter an object of dread and loathing to the fool writer, but if it is a good word and has no exact modern equivalent equally good, it is good enough for the good writer. Indeed, a writer's attitude toward "obsolete" words is as true a measure of his literary ability as anything except the character of his work. A dictionary of obsolete and obsolescent words would not only be singularly rich in strong and sweet parts of speech; it would add large possessions to the vocabulary of every competent writer who might not happen to be a competent reader.

A wolf that was once, or is sometimes, a man. All werewolves are of evil disposition, having assumed a bestial form to gratify a bestial appetite, but some, transformed by sorcery, are as humane as is consistent with an acquired taste for human flesh.
Some Bavarian peasants having caught a wolf one evening, tied it to a post by the tail and went to bed. The next morning nothing was there! Greatly perplexed, they consulted the local priest, who told them that their captive was undoubtedly a werewolf and had resumed its human form during the night. "The next time that you take a wolf," the good man said, "see that you chain it by the leg, and in the morning you will find a Lutheran."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A fossil patriot of the early agricultural period, found in the old red soapstone underlying Kansas; characterized by an uncommon spread of ear, which some naturalists contend gave him the power of flight, though Professors Morse and Whitney, pursuing independent lines of thought, have ingeniously pointed out that had he possessed it he would have gone elsewhere. In the picturesque speech of his period, some fragments of which have come down to us, he was known as "The Matter with Kansas."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) job that pays well and requires little to no real work; job held by a person who is too important to work

a competitive recreational activity. exists for the detriment of schoolchildren so they may build character, as well as for the benefit of the gambling community.

"real" sports: football, hockey, tennis, basketball, baseball, pugilism, allegedly lacrosse and polo in places where rich people are found

"not real" sports (that is, possibly made up on the spot as an elaborate prank): curling, cricket

(n.) a craft intended to move across the top of a body of water. if it's really big it's called a ship. musical performer styx famously used one of these to saaaaaaaail away

The kind of civility that urban observers ascribe to dwellers in all cities but New York. Its commonest expression is heard in the words, "I beg your pardon," and it is not inconsistent with disregard of the rights of others.

---

The owner of a powder mill
Was musing on a distant hill —
Something his mind foreboded —
When from the cloudless sky there fell
A deviled human kidney! Well,
The man's mill had exploded.
His hat he lifted from his head;
"I beg your pardon, sir," he said;
"I didn't know 'twas loaded."
—Swatkin

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A lawyer with a roving commission.


(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a winged vehicle designed to travel through the air, fulfilling mankind's most frivolous dream. heap big devil bird.

a convenient way of reaching destinations expeditiously, and of delivering bombs to hiroshima.

may or may not contain snakes

(n.) just look at this bad boy: it's a bad way to live, *and* a book at the very same time!
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34466958-bullshit-jobs

(noun):
A mythological figure in spandex, armed with superpowers and a wardrobe that defies practicality. They battle villains, save the day, and occasionally face existential crises about their secret identities.

(also: superhero)
(also: american art of saving the day)

A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul. A Tartar Emetic.
(also: suicidal novelists)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)