skin seen as the canvas for artworks in the medium of ink

n. The kind of political and social reformer who is more concerned to bring others down to his plane than to lift himself to theirs.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

to sing some medieval Hebrew poetry that you've half-memorized out of a book along with all the other congregants. If you want to seek a true connection to God beyond mere recitation, the translation can be found on the opposite-facing page.

It is often said that a disproportionate obsession with purely academic or abstract matters indicates a retreat from the problems of real life.(also: life)

However, most of the people engaged in such matters say that this attitude is based on three things: ignorance, stupidity and nothing else.(also: stupid)

Philosophers for example argue that they are very much concerned with the problems posed by "real life": like for instance "What do we mean by real?" and "How can we reach an empirical definition of life?" and so on.

One definition of life, albeit not a particularly useful one, might run something like this:

Life is like a grapefruit: It's sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half of one for breakfast. (also: breakfast)

One of the extraordinary things about life is the sort of places it's prepared to put up with living. Anywhere it can get some sort of grip, whether it's the intoxicating seas of Santraginus V where the fish never seem to care whatever the heck kind of direction they swim in, the fire storms of Frastra, where, they say, life begins at 40,000 degrees, or just burrowing around in the lower intestine of a rat for the sheer unadulterated hell of it, life will always find a way of hanging on in somewhere.

a Day when people should try to make you feel happy, but give you simply presents instead.

Usually, you don't even get a breakfest in Bed (.

What's normal anyways?
(also: life)
(also: the universe)
(also: humans)

(n.) uh... ham.

n. A child of two races, ashamed of both.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

The House of Indifference. Tombs are now by common consent invested with a certain sanctity, but when they have been long tenanted it is considered no sin to break them open and rifle them, the famous Egyptologist, Dr. Huggyns, explaining that a tomb may be innocently "glened" as soon as its occupant is done "smellynge," the soul being then all exhaled. This reasonable view is now generally accepted by archæologists, whereby the noble science of Curiosity has been greatly dignified.
(also: death)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A small metal disk given as a reward for virtues, attainments or services more or less authentic.
It is related of Bismarck, who had been awarded a medal for gallantly rescuing a drowning person, that, being asked the meaning of the medal, he replied: "I save lives sometimes." And sometimes he didn't.
(also: war)
(also: sports)
(also: the devils dictionary)

The act of talking to oneself eloquently and grandiosely, as if someone were listening. To see it as anything but a sign of delusions of grandeur is to break the fourth wall.

(n.) a craft intended to move across the top of a body of water. if it's really big it's called a ship. musical performer styx famously used one of these to saaaaaaaail away

That quality in art which is most painful to the prurient.

A careless abbreviation of requiescat in pace, attesting an indolent goodwill to the dead. According to the learned Dr. Drigge, however, the letters originally meant nothing more than reductus in pulvis.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. Uncommon extension of the fear of death.

(also: longanimity)

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

victim of patriarchy

(n.) with your eyes closed and your mind resting, you just might link to the OG.

(also: dreams)
(also: default mode network)

(n.) a special kind of grown-up root beer that quenches the sweltering fires in both your throat and your loins

for some reason quite popular among cowboys in the movies. well. "some" reason.

When people know you are far too clever to give a simple answer but they don't know you are far too lazy to come up with something epic so you land in a neutral answer to confuse the hell out of people.

(n.) one who tracks down and apprehends people for money, usually criminals who have jumped bail.

somewhat similar to a private detective but less likely to wear a monochrome trench coat or monologue to oneself in the rain