the roman world was in a mess; the emperor caused no end of stress
then in the year four-forty-one, there came this guy, attila the hun
run away! Here comes attila
flee today! he'll sack your villa
can't you see? he's come to kill ya
swipe your bed, and then your pilla
attila was a nasty king; he and his huns wrecked everything
he lived by arson and the sword, burned down france cuz he got bored
run away! here comes attila
far away! go to manilla
kills more people than godzilla
swipes your sheets and then your pilla
to a wedding attila went, looking sharp like a hunnish gent
made a quick speech, went to bed; very next morning, was found dead
fare thee well, goodbye attila
bury him deep neath the rolling hillas
he wore shorts made of chinchilla
his favorite ice cream was strawberry

(1162 – 1227) – Military and political leader of the Mongols.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: genghis kahn quotes)

(n.) intense physical activity used to improve one's physical condition so that they may justify overeating and laziness to their own conscience

(n.) someone trained to operate aboard a spacecraft, braving such dangers as the pitiless vacuum of space, the burning agony of unshielded radiation, the wasting-away of their bone and muscle mass, and the existential agony that accompanies total realization of one's insignificance in the grand scheme of things, all in the hopes of exploring totally uninhabitable places with generally little in the way of mineral wealth.

astronauts may be said to blur the line between courageous heroism and flagrant stupidity

A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted, and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a "joke."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a secondary banana. a backup singer. a trusted subordinate. a euphemistic way of describing one's gay lover.

a region of northern europe consisting of sweden, denmark, and norway.

once the land of vikings, now primarily a source of weird european things

flɔrɪdə/ (noun): a state in the southeastern United States, known for its warm climate, beaches, and tourist attractions. Florida is pronounced as "FLAW-ruh-duh" or "FLOR-uh-duh" in the IPA. It is also where "Florida man" lives

A really nice guy from the bible.

“You never fail until you stop trying.”
― Albert Einstein
(also: Albert Einstein)

dying is part of life

To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a process of converting someone to a specific belief, perspective, or series of behavior processes. These methods vary by culture, and by government. an ancient alien race known as the reapers may or may not be the originators of these complex and multi-faceted techniques of behavior (and thought) modification.

(also: military)
(also: minecraft)

An instinct to approach and deal with things in uncommon ways. Two dimensions measure one's creativity - originality and initiative, which can in this order be described as quality and quantity.

A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul. A Tartar Emetic.
(also: suicidal novelists)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(AD 50 – 121) Inventor of paper.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: ts'ai lun quotes)

someone who spends time doing what they love

Censorious language by another concerning oneself.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(noun phrase) The caped crusader of education, equipped with an arsenal of dry-erase markers and a utility belt stocked with endless supplies of patience. They possess the extraordinary ability to keep a straight face while defusing classroom chaos and turning learning into a thrilling adventure. With their superhuman multitasking skills, they grade papers at the speed of light and deliver knowledge with the power of a thousand encyclopedias.


(also: my dog ate my homework)