The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a contraption of silicon, glass and plastic that serves as a secondary brain so that people do not have to handle all that tedious thought by themselves

n. A large stone presented by the archangel Gabriel to the patriarch Abraham, and preserved at Mecca. The patriarch had perhaps asked the archangel for bread.

“Dance, when you're broken open. Dance, if you've torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you're perfectly free.”
― Rumi
(also: rumi)

n. a process by which several legal professionals argue with each other with an older legal professional serving as referee in order to convince a small group of people who couldn't talk themselves out of jury duty that one legal professional is more correct than the other.

one who is having a bad time, forcing you to sympathize

In law, a solemn appeal to the Deity, made binding upon the conscience by a penalty for perjury.

“He's not perfect. You aren't either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn't going to quote poetry, he's not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don't hurt him, don't change him, and don't expect for more than he can give. Don't analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he's not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don't exist, but there's always one guy that is perfect for you.”
― Bob Marley
(also: Bob Marley)

(n) A convenient excuse for the Almighty to shirk their divine duties and leave humanity to their own devices. One can only imagine the heavenly distractions that must be more important than answering prayers or intervening in earthly affairs. Perhaps God is binge-watching a new series on Netflix or indulging in a celestial spa day. Either way, mere mortals will have to wait until God returns to their desk to handle the backlog of requests. In the meantime, humans may have to resort to solving their own problems, like adults.

(also: creation of the universe)

(n.) a craft intended to move across the top of a body of water. if it's really big it's called a ship. musical performer styx famously used one of these to saaaaaaaail away

New York's ugly, unappreciated sister.

A favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.

(n.) like flavor but for fundamental properties of matter

Coofl is a useless website that the founder begging for help. He should find different method and place to promote his website (also: naked tax advice)

(noun): A persistent and measurable increase in the general price level of goods and services in an economy over a period of time. In simpler terms, it's when everything seems to cost more and your money is worth less. Just think of it as the ultimate prank played on you by the wealthy elite, where they laugh all the way to the bank while you're stuck holding the bag.

(n.) the joy that accompanies seeing a rival or enemy suffer; sort of the reverse of an empathetic cringe of embarrassment

(n.) learning from nature in how to do systems & society design



(also: humility)
(also: learning)
(also: solarpunk)

An implement that cries aloud for hands accustomed to the pen.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a small island country pretending not to be part of italy. apparently the stronghold of an order of medieval crusader knights, and yet somehow those da vinci code guys never seem to pay it all that much attention

enthrallingly off-putting