(n.) planet earth's seventh continent, as long as one decides to list it seventh while counting, and which is not a continent, technically speaking (it's just australia, which *is* a continent, and all the other places in the pacific that don't belong to any others)

in addition to australia, oceania is usually considered to include
* micronesia (including kiribati, resting comfortably right on the international date line)
* melanesia (including papua new guinea and, like... I guess some places they might have used for filming in "survivor." anyone remember that show?)
* and polynesia (including new zealand, hawaii, samoa, and the delightful statue heads at easter island)

a horrific mouthless bird-monster used in heraldry. It doesn't represent anything.

The literary sloven's word for "virtually."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. One who peddles ready-made emotion, and who, despising us for the qualities upon which he feeds, is by us despised for the unwholesome character of his diet. See STICK.


(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Shaming people just because they are dictators. It is illegal in many 3rd world countries.

(also: most common shaming practices)
(also: necessary shaming practices)

(n.) a strong stimulant which promises to transform a sluggish old workhorse into an alert young stallion, at the price of also becoming a bad-tempered and aggressive onager.

their appeal may possible be explained thus: there are very few fat meth users (though there is at least a little overlap in that particular Venn diagram; see trucker)

also called "meth" for those who prefer more streamlined speech

(n.) one of nature's more impressive primal displays, a huge arc of electricity that courses through the air during atmospheric storms, striking the nearest convenient point of low electrical potential, and superheating the air to cause an explosion we call thunder

if it could only be greased, then lightning might well prove to be automatic, systematic, and hydromatic, and indeed, may be a useful way to get lots of tit.

quotation marks used to denote that you totally did not just use that word.

(n.) that which follows the dissolution or destruction of government authority; like most philosophical things, we are assured it would be really cool if we did it correctly next time

Is this real life? Or is it just fantasy?
Cause in a landslide with no escape from reality.
Open your eyes.
Look to the skies and seeeee.

n. An apparatus with which we think that we think. That which distinguishes the man who is content to be something from the man who wishes to do something. A man of great wealth, or one who has been pitchforked into high station, has commonly such a headful of brain that his neighbors cannot keep their hats on. In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, brain is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

The gift or power of being in all places at one time, but not in all places at all times, which is omnipresence, an attribute of God and the luminiferous ether only. This important distinction between ubiquity and omnipresence was not clear to the mediæval Church and there was much bloodshed about it. Certain Lutherans, who affirmed the presence everywhere of Christ's body, were known as Ubiquitarians. For this error they were doubtless damned, for Christ's body is present only in the eucharist, though that sacrament may be performed in more than one place simultaneously. In recent times ubiquity has not always been understood — not even by Sir Boyle Roche, for example, who held that a man cannot be in two places at once unless he is a bird.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it. An evidence of culture and a passport to polite society. Supportable property.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Having the quality of magazine poetry. (also: FLUMMERY)

Anarchy is a society being freely constituted without authorities or a governing body. It may also refer to a society or group of people that entirely rejects a set hierarchy. The word Anarchy was first used in English in 1539, meaning "an absence of government".

Vegan
Ovo Vegetarian
Lacto Vegetarian
Lacto-ovo Vegetarian
Pescatarian
Flexitarian
Beegan
(also: Macrobiotic)

someone who enjoys gobbling down fine food

n. A descendant of Levi, from whose posterity the Lord ordained all the Jewish priests — an instance of nepotism deserving of the severest censure, as incompatible with free institutions and the principle of civil and religious equality.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a logical fallacy where I don't follow

In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.
(also: Congress)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)