A weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh. Among the Jews observance of the day was enforced by a Commandment of which this is the Christian version: "Remember the seventh day to make thy neighbor keep it wholly." To the Creator it seemed fit and expedient that the Sabbath should be the last day of the week, but the Early Fathers of the Church held other views. So great is the sanctity of the day that even where the Lord holds a doubtful and precarious jurisdiction over those who go down to (and down into) the sea it is reverently recognized, as is manifest in the following deep-water version of the Fourth Commandment:

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Six days shalt thou labor and do all thou art able,
And on the seventh holystone the deck and scrape the cable.

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Decks are no longer holystoned, but the cable still supplies the captain with opportunity to attest a pious respect for the divine ordinance.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a state of society or communal existence where everything is immaculate and perfect. It still wouldn't be good enough for you though, would it?

n. One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
(also: the devils dictionary)

one of the more pervasive postulates in the field of hooey.

in summarium, the idea that veins of vague, unquantifiable "energy" crisscross the planet, intersecting at points of equally vague significance, usually ones humans handily chose to mark with photogenic landmarks such as stonehenge

equivalent to "dragon paths" in chinese culture, to "songlines" in australian aboriginal culture, and (functionally) to aliens building the pyramids in sane person culture.

Calepine of Outré Fringe Linguistics

(n.) a place of assembly and worship in wisconsonian religion, in which the sacred duty of milk and cheese production is carried out.

(1847 – 1931) – Inventor and businessman helped introduce electricity and electric light bulbs.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: thomas edison quotes)

A thing that mostly satisfies reformers opposed to reformation.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Freedom without limits is just a word.
(also: error)

Cock and Ball torture, a sexual activity involving torture of the male's genitals

This can include: Wax Play, Genital Spanking, Squeezing, Ball Busting, Genital Flogging, Genital Flogging, Urethral Playing, Tickle Torture, Erotic electrostimulation, and Kicking.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde
(also: Oscar Wilde quotes)

(n.) a perturbing sea creature resembling a big slug with eight suction-cupped tendril arms. as with most perturbing creatures, someone has eaten it and decided it is a delicacy

n. A person more learned in the languages of others than wise in his own.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others

a region of northern europe consisting of sweden, denmark, and norway.

once the land of vikings, now primarily a source of weird european things

(n.) music for those moody angst-ridden teenager types; derived from a mix of african-american styles like jazz and country or gospel

(also: pantaloons)

That quality in art which is most painful to the prurient.

World of Tanks, or WoT, is a video game, generally disliked by most of the people who stubbornly play it. It's a videogame about Tanks, of which there are very few games, so there aern't many other options.
(also: gamer)

A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.