apathy

jason
a state of emotional distress experienced while ashamed of emotion, preferring the aesthetic of stone-hearted rationality and objectivity.

charity

orikami
(v.) a fine, tricky venture. be careful you're not kidding yourself on your motives.
yes, the effect of $100 is roughly the same, whether you did out of a need to think of yourself as a 'good person' or out of a focus on the other person or a cause. but don't fall prey to moral backsliding.

(also: virtue)
(also: moral backsliding)

medal

the devils dictionary
n. A small metal disk given as a reward for virtues, attainments or services more or less authentic.
It is related of Bismarck, who had been awarded a medal for gallantly rescuing a drowning person, that, being asked the meaning of the medal, he replied: "I save lives sometimes." And sometimes he didn't.
(also: war)
(also: sports)
(also: the devils dictionary)

life lie

orikami
(n.) chaining yourself to an anchor and throwing yourself out to sea... except the anchor is a thick collection of personal beliefs that things are not good now and cannot change (or be changed), e.g. for the better; and the sea is life.

these anchors are sticky and hard to break, I know. so fight (or dance! sometimes you gotta switch the MO) with everything you have, to crash your previous relating to the world: life owes me, people don't love me, they don't respect me, and so on.
start building up whatever emotional need you have -- from within. people don't love you? ok, love yourself. love yourself like your life depends on it. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15704926-love-yourself-like-your-life-depends-on-it life owes you? give your care, your attention, some skill, and make a habit of it in some definite (if small) way; and breathe; and you will know your rewards.
"make like a tree and have a long, stable life benefitting those around you."

(also: black-pilled)
(also: learned helplessness)
(also: doom and gloom)
(also: doomer)

(also: gold-pilled)
(also: stoicism)
(also: serenity prayer)
(also: solarpunk)
(also: long view)

sigmund freud

mirat
(noun): The OG mind explorer, Austrian bloke who got a kick out of diving into the depths of human weirdness. Known for his wild ideas about Oedipal complexes and dream meanings, he was always down for a psychological deep dive. Just don't invite him to your party, he's a buzzkill.

magnitude

the devils dictionary
Size. Magnitude being purely relative, nothing is large and nothing small. If everything in the universe were increased in bulk one thousand diameters nothing would be any larger than it was before, but if one thing remained unchanged all the others would be larger than they had been. To an understanding familiar with the relativity of magnitude and distance the spaces and masses of the astronomer would be no more impressive than those of the microscopist. For anything we know to the contrary, the visible universe may be a small part of an atom, with its component ions, floating in the life-fluid (luminiferous ether) of some animal. Possibly the wee creatures peopling the corpuscles of our own blood are overcome with the proper emotion when contemplating the unthinkable distance from one of these to another.

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