a blind human who insists that every sighted person is a liar
Having full power. A Minister Plenipotentiary is a diplomatist possessing absolute authority on condition that he never exert it.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Expression. The artful response to someone's attempt at assistance that's akin to receiving a single raisin as payment for winning a chocolate factory.
(also: shame on you)
(also: shame on you)
Holding in trust and subject to an accounting the property of the indolent, the incompetent, the unthrifty, the envious and the luckless. That is the view that prevails in the underworld, where the Brotherhood of Man finds its most logical development and candid advocacy. To denizens of the midworld the word means good and wise.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A nether habiliment of the adult civilized male. The garment is tubular and unprovided with hinges at the points of flexion. Supposed to have been invented by a humorist. Called "trousers" by the enlightened and "pants" by the unworthy.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
to torture someone who may or may not be guilty until they tell you they're guilty
(n.) politely saying sorry after you hit them with a hockey stick
(n.) the state of overwhelm, by the societal & technological & etc. changes, "too much, too fast; no time to process it"..
still better than death by 1000 cuts, imo.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Future_Shock
https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2019/jun/18/years-and-years-2019-terrifying-tv-show-russell-t-davies
still better than death by 1000 cuts, imo.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Future_Shock
https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2019/jun/18/years-and-years-2019-terrifying-tv-show-russell-t-davies
(n.) an unplaceable sense of discomfort, illness, or infirmity, not to be confused with mayonnaise (though both should be avoided)
n. A union of two or more parties, factions or associations for promoting some purpose, commonly nefarious.
(also: football)
(also: basketball)
(also: nba)
(also: nfl)
(also: baseball)
(also: arab legue)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: football)
(also: basketball)
(also: nba)
(also: nfl)
(also: baseball)
(also: arab legue)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The founding or endowing of universities and public libraries by gift or bequest.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(n.) a city
In the winter time the temperature falls well below the legal minimum, or rather it would do if anybody had the common sense to set a legal minimum. The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.
In the summer it's too darn hot. It's one thing to be the sort of life form that thrives on heat and finds, as the Frastrans do, that the temperature range between 40,000 and 40,004 is very equable, but it's quite another to be the sort of animal that has to wrap itself up in lots of other animals at one point in your planet's orbit, and then find, half an orbit later, that your skin's bubbling.
Spring is over-rated. A lot of the inhabitants of New York will honk on mightily about the pleasures of spring, but if they actually knew the first thing about the pleasures of spring they would know of at least five thousand nine hundred and eighty three better places to spend it than New York, and that's just on the same latitude.
Fall, though, is the worst. Few things are worse than fall in New York. Some of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats would disagree, but most of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats are highly disagreeable anyway, so their opinion can and should be discounted. When it's fall in New York, the air smells as if someone's been frying goats in it, and if you are keen to breathe, the best plan is to open a window and stick your head in a building.
(also: new orleans)
In the winter time the temperature falls well below the legal minimum, or rather it would do if anybody had the common sense to set a legal minimum. The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.
In the summer it's too darn hot. It's one thing to be the sort of life form that thrives on heat and finds, as the Frastrans do, that the temperature range between 40,000 and 40,004 is very equable, but it's quite another to be the sort of animal that has to wrap itself up in lots of other animals at one point in your planet's orbit, and then find, half an orbit later, that your skin's bubbling.
Spring is over-rated. A lot of the inhabitants of New York will honk on mightily about the pleasures of spring, but if they actually knew the first thing about the pleasures of spring they would know of at least five thousand nine hundred and eighty three better places to spend it than New York, and that's just on the same latitude.
Fall, though, is the worst. Few things are worse than fall in New York. Some of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats would disagree, but most of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats are highly disagreeable anyway, so their opinion can and should be discounted. When it's fall in New York, the air smells as if someone's been frying goats in it, and if you are keen to breathe, the best plan is to open a window and stick your head in a building.
(also: new orleans)
The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day.
(also: radical)
(also: governing people)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: radical)
(also: governing people)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Human beings make life so interesting. Do you know, that in a universe so full of wonders, they have managed to invent boredom.
(also: boredom)
(also: boredom)
There is an art, or, rather, a knack to flying.
The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Pick a nice day and try it.
The first part is easy:
All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and the willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.
That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.
Most people fall to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.
Clearly, it is the second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.
It is notoriously difficult to prize your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.
If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.
This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.
Bob and float, bob and float.
Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.
Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.
They are most likely to say something along the lines of "Good God, you can't possibly be flying!"
It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.
Waft higher and higher.
Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.
DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.
When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.
(also: boeing)
(also: airbus)
(n.) a force that exists within a young girl's heart which can purportedly free her if sufficiently groovy
so undeniably true that you cannot possibly take the risk that you might accidentally show it false
(n.) a means of supposedly directly messaging a deity
(also: spam)
(also: spam)
A logical formula consisting of a major and a minor assumption and an inconsequent.
(also: logic)
(also: logic)
sign-up or face the consequences!
“"observers" must obey the call.”
join