(n.) a painfully stupid bird prone to screeching, violent spasms and getting itself killed flailing against panes of glass. regarded as a symbol of peace, presumably because they're so fragile and have trouble defending themselves

(n.) an informal term of address with multiple possible meanings

1) an easygoing, purposeless southern Californian beach bum

2) (in the Old West) a preening cityslicker dandy who is out of his element in more rugged climes
exactly what these two have to do with each other fair boggles the mind

(n.) the evening meal in most cultures, often a social occasion for members of a family to exchange bland pleasantries and cram down the day's anxieties and frustrations

Muhammad
Isaac Newton
Jesus of Nazareth
Buddha
Confucius
St. Paul
Ts'ai Lun
Johann Gutenberg
Christopher Columbus
Albert Einstein
Louis Pasteur
Galileo Galilei
Aristotle
Euclid
Moses
Charles Darwin
Shih Huang Ti
Augustus Caesar
Nicolaus Copernicus
Antoine Laurent Lavoisier
Constantine the Great
James Watt
Michael Faraday
James Clerk Maxwell
Martin Luther
George Washington
Karl Marx
Orville and Wilbur Wright
Genghis Kahn
Adam Smith
William Shakespeare
John Dalton
Alexander the Great
Napoleon Bonaparte
Thomas Edison
Antony van Leeuwenhoek
William T.G. Morton
Guglielmo Marconi
Adolf Hitler
Plato
Alexander Graham Bell
Alexander Fleming
John Locke
Ludwig van Beethoven
Werner Heisenberg
Louis Daguerre
Simon Bolivar
Rene Descartes
Michelangelo
Pope Urban II
Umar ibn al-Khattab
Asoka
St. Augustine
William Harvey
Ernest Rutherford
John Calvin
Gregor Mendel
Max Planck
Joseph Lister
Nikolaus August Otto
Francisco Pizarro
Hernando Cortes
Thomas Jefferson
Queen Isabella I
Joseph Stalin
Julius Caesar
William the Conqueror
Sigmund Freud
Edward Jenner
Wilhelm Conrad Roentgen
Johann Sebastian Bach
Lao Tzu
Voltaire
Johannes Kepler
Enrico Fermi
Leonhard Euler
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
niccolo machiavelli
Thomas Malthus
John F. Kennedy
Gregory Pincus
Mani
Lenin
Sui Wen Ti
Vasco da Gama
Cyrus the Great
Peter the Great
Mao Zedong
Francis Bacon
Henry Ford
Mencius
Zoroaster
Queen Elizabeth I
Mikhail Gorbachev
Menes
Charlemagne
Homer
Justinian I
Mahavira

n. In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) explorers who are less concerned with the wondrous new lands and customs and more concerned with the workload they're escaping

The quality of seeing a problem and seeing a solution while doing the most horrid things to get what you want

also a way of removing unsightly bikini-area hair in one fell stroke

someone who spends time doing what they love

reputable graverobber.
(also: graverobbing)

a surgical examination of your own body to determine how you died

(n.) a traditional form of halloween decoration consisting of a vegetable that has been mutilated and disemboweled. a candle is then placed inside the hollowed-out specimen so that the baleful light may evoke the visage of a hideous, grinning face, to be presented on one's doorstep on halloween night.

the real horror comes days after that when you have to clean it up.

(also: pumpkin)

A mechanical apparatus designed to do the work of a man- from The encyclopedia galactica.

"Your Plastic Pal Who's Fun To Be With."- from the marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation.

(n.) 1) a trait which is inherited in a non-physical, non-genetic way, such as language. 2) the most insufferable goddam thing you can conceive of if it cloned itself, had sex with the clone and then ate the resulting babies for the +2 insufferability bonus.

A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.

(n.) a large feline predator of africa (formerly of other places), whose men wear wigs while the women go crew-cut

A family of vertebrate animals whose females in a state of nature suckle their young, but when civilized and enlightened put them out to nurse, or use the bottle.
(also: the devils dictionary)

In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.

---

Having received an ultimatum from Austria, the Turkish Ministry met to consider it.

"O servant of the Prophet," said the Sheik of the Imperial Chibouk to the Mamoosh of the Invincible Army, "how many unconquerable soldiers have we in arms?"

"Upholder of the Faith," that dignitary replied after examining his memoranda, "they are in numbers as the leaves of the forest!"

"And how many impenetrable battleships strike terror to the hearts of all Christian swine?" he asked the Imaum of the Ever Victorious Navy.

"Uncle of the Full Moon," was the reply, "deign to know that they are as the waves of the ocean, the sands of the desert and the stars of Heaven!"

For eight hours the broad brow of the Sheik of the Imperial Chibouk was corrugated with evidences of deep thought: he was calculating the chances of war. Then, "Sons of angels," he said, "the die is cast! I shall suggest to the Ulema of the Imperial Ear that he advise inaction. In the name of Allah, the council is adjourned."

(also: war)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

it's a big building with generals, but that's not important now

A telephone that is easy to bring with you and runs on batterys (maby chargeable). It can often send text messages and maby has a camera.

(also: telephone)
(also: text messages)