(n.) drops of water which condense within clouds and fall from the sky. this tends to happen only when the weatherman said it would not

cultural stuff that is more inherently edifying and intellectually stimulating; this means nobody wants to actually pay for it, but fortunately it usually qualifies for government subsidy

Every German who chugs a beer! Every Zulu with an assegai spear!
Every Chinaman in a junk! Every Mexican in a trunk!
Every Bedouin on a dune! Every Frenchman playing Claire de Lune!
Every Syrian and Kazakhstani! Every Giorgio and his Armani!
Every Spaniard playing second flute! Every Dane, Norwegian and Aleut!
Every single guy who's Aborigine! Every Englishman who's Walter Pidgeon-y
From Hollywood, home of big celebrities- to Vanuatu in the Outer Hebrides!
From New Yorkers eatin' steak tartare! To every friend of Pablo Escobar!
From the Taiwanese and Cuban Petes, to the Russians with their soup of beets
Every Tamil, Tatar, Thai, Tibetan; everybody else that we're forgettin'
Everyone from Niger, Tonga, Bali; the French Sudan which is now called Mali
Everybody up in Katmandu! Every Canadian, cuz we're there too
Every Tajikistani with a yak! Every Bolivian in a sack!
Every caner in Singapore! Everybody who's really sore!
Every Turk in a Teaneck diner, or South African diamond miner
Every gypsy playin' finger cymbals! Everyone who ever shopped at Gimble's
We are there.

n. A descendant of Levi, from whose posterity the Lord ordained all the Jewish priests — an instance of nepotism deserving of the severest censure, as incompatible with free institutions and the principle of civil and religious equality.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Superfluous; needless; de trop.

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The Sultan said: "There's evidence abundant
To prove this unbelieving dog redundant."
To whom the Grand Vizier, with mien impressive,
Replied: "His head, at least, appears excessive."
—Habeeb Suleiman

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Mr. Debs is a redundant citizen.
—Theodore Roosevelt
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Fermented grape-juice known to the Women's Christian Union as "liquor," sometimes as "rum." Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(noun):

A small yet mighty word that possesses the power to render previous statements utterly irrelevant.

(also: nice guys)

1) the galaxy in which our puny planet resides. because our earth lies relatively far from the center, we can observe most of this galaxy stretched out across the night sky in a glorious cosmic arch, should one desire a reminder of our utter insignificance

2) a confection consisting of a rectangular bit of whipped mousse and molten sugarcane, coated in a mixture of ground chalk and boiled potato skins with milk chocolate flavoring. british people will insist on calling it a mars bar, with the effect of rendering it far less out of this world.

A species of geese indigenous to Portugal. They are mostly without feathers and imperfectly edible, even when stuffed with garlic.
(also: spain)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

an extra feature of a movie where you get to see the start of a scene, but then it gets interrupted by a character laughing, and then the rest of the characters laughing

(n.) the angels are not limited to human form.
so maybe, be a little afraid, just don't go off the deep end.

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/biblically-accurate-angels-be-not-afraid


"Basically, when the people writing Scripture tried to describe what they saw when they saw an angel… they run into the end of their imagination… they can never quite seem to fully explain it because they had trouble even comprehending what they saw, let alone being able to describe it to someone else."




(also: angels)
(also: multi-headed)
(also: multi-handed)
(also: bible)
(also: doctor who)

(n.) a big fancy piano sort of thing that you can play. alternatively, a series of meatsacks within your body which are used to play you.

“He that can have patience can have what he will.”
― Benjamin Franklin
(also: Benjamin Franklin)

Anyone not from 'round these parts. And we don't like those types 'round here.

There is an art, or, rather, a knack to flying.

The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Pick a nice day and try it.


The first part is easy:

All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and the willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.
That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.
Most people fall to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.
Clearly, it is the second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.

It is notoriously difficult to prize your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.

If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.

This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.
Bob and float, bob and float.


Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.
Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.
They are most likely to say something along the lines of "Good God, you can't possibly be flying!"
It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.
Waft higher and higher.
Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.
DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.
When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.

(also: boeing)
(also: airbus)

N. A group that shares similar genetic material via sexual reproduction. With the parental beings usually (except in Alabama) originating from different familial units
(also: alabama)
(also: problem of alabama)
(also: family bussinesses in alabama)

2. N. In case the first definition is full of crazy, hateful, or downright evil people and one gets disowned (whether by choice or not) the discarded individual will usually seek to build their own more perfect version by choosing different people/things/animals to surround themselves with.

An average sized man who was born on an island, and died on a different island. He als had some interesting adventures in between.

(n.) a contraption of silicon, glass and plastic that serves as a secondary brain so that people do not have to handle all that tedious thought by themselves

Is the time when you realize that you wasted your entire life,and that you are a horrible person,and the biggest loser in the world,and that no one will remember you after your death and schools will call you the biggest loser in the entire human history and will teach student how not to be like you.

The denial of love, life and liberty.