(n.) european country equally unwanted by the french and the dutch. the most famous belgian person is tintin, a fictional character.

The instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
(also: freedom)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A woman that has sex with everyone and wears revealing clothing.

(n.) something meant to be sat upon. one of those modern conveniences that are thankfully easy to improvise in times of shortage

vlad iii (1428ish-1476ish) was a ruler in romania who became famous for brutally massacring turkish people to get out of paying them back for their assistance in brutally massacring the hungarians

he was not a vampire, but at some point bram stoker, and then the entire world, decided he would be more interesting if he were a vampire. so now everyone just pretends he was. today, dracula-the-vampire is one of the most prolific characters in all of fiction, but has probably not seen a penny of the royalties himself, which just goes to show who the real bloodsuckers are.

(also: european union)

(n.) code words used to make one's job sound more difficult than it, in fact, is

The ratio of people tired of someone else's shit. Typically measured by county, city, or state, where applicable.

(also: North Carolina)

a flavoring that is nigh omnipresent on food products in the western world between late summer and autumn. presumably there is some deep ritualistic significance behind this custom, though it remains doggedly beyond the understanding of our finest minds

originally used on pumpkins, a variety of pumpkin spiced watermelon

piece of the former yugoslavia, and formerly united with the czech republic

artists andy warhol and steve ditko came from slovak immigrant families, suggesting that this is mostly a place people come from rather than go to

Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was once more common than it is now. Arasthus tells of a peasant who was occupied by a different devil for every day in the week, and on Sundays by two. They were frequently seen, always walking in his shadow, when he had one, but were finally driven away by the village notary, a holy man; but they took the peasant with them, for he vanished utterly. A devil thrown out of a woman by the Archbishop of Rheims ran through the streets, pursued by a hundred persons, until the open country was reached, where by a leap higher than a church spire he escaped into a bird. A chaplain in Cromwell's army exorcised a soldier's obsessing devil by throwing the soldier into the water, when the devil came to the surface. The soldier, unfortunately, did not.

(n.) elongated fragments of potato that have had the nutritional value fried and salted out of them. a highly accessible food sold in many venues as a side dish

playfully referred to as "french fries," though our best intelligence suggests they may have come from belgium instead (they may also be called "freedom fries" if the french are going through a period of significant unpopularity)

Supa Hot Fire [soo-pah haat fahy*uh*r]

*noun*

Not a rapper.

(also: Rap)
(also: Art)

a play that's supposed to be pretty good or something. sprung from the mind of william shakespeare.

it's the tale of a prince of denmark whose father dies mysteriously, and he comes to believe his uncle killed said father for the throne after he either a) receives a visit from said father's ghost or b) merely hallucinates seeing the ghost. the rest of the play consists of him trying to trip his uncle into admitting it while he makes lots of vagina jokes, and in the end everyone dies. also there are two clowns who keep showing up to caper around so that the main actors have a chance to change costumes.

at least, i think that's the gist of it. it's kinda hard to make sense of all this iambic pentameter.

(n.) um... ask your mother.

A perverted affection that has strayed to one's own wife.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

"Glowie" is short for GlowNigger which is when a member of law enforcement is so obvious, even though they are under deep cover.

Usually on an image board, but you can get the same effect by calling undercover cops Glowie.

The least hateful form of dejection.
(also: please)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

as it happens, i think you'll find i'm the one who's spartacus

(n.) the hoary specter of death's pay-by-installment plan

(adj.) describing one who is in the process of mutating into a frailer, wrinklier, balder form of life