credenza

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a dining room cabinet or sideboard, short enough to serve as a secondary table, in which one (presumably one unwilling to admit they have a problem) may store their booze.

the name 'credenza' comes to us from italian, and means 'trusted one,' apparently because these cabinets were where food was taste-tested for poison before being presented to the pope

be not afraid

orikami
(n.) the angels are not limited to human form.
so maybe, be a little afraid, just don't go off the deep end.

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/biblically-accurate-angels-be-not-afraid
be not afraid
be not afraid
"Basically, when the people writing Scripture tried to describe what they saw when they saw an angel… they run into the end of their imagination… they can never quite seem to fully explain it because they had trouble even comprehending what they saw, let alone being able to describe it to someone else."

be not afraid
be not afraid

(also: angels)
(also: multi-headed)
(also: multi-handed)
(also: bible)
(also: doctor who)

ninja

trustycoffeemug
(n.) heir to a centuries-long tradition of warlord-employed assassins and spies hailing from japan. very easily identified by distinctive black full-body pajamas (one would think this might interfere with the spying and assassinating but evidently not)

amber heard

despot
am•bur hurd-ing :/ (adj)

One who lies on, gaslights, verbally & physically abuses their partner/spouse.

also:/
One who commits perjury.

also:/
One who fake cries, forces ugly and “sad” facial expressions, and continuously avoids questions she's being asked by the defense, and answers the questions she hears in her own small peanut brain.

Used in a sentence:/

“Can you believe how hard Ashley is Amber Hearding her husband?!? You can clearly see why Justin had to get away from her!”

“ Stay away from that one, the next thing you know she will be you Amber Hearding you to death!”

tortoise

the devils dictionary
A creature thoughtfully created to supply occasion for the following lines by the illustrious Ambat Delaso:

TO MY PET TORTOISE

My friend, you are not graceful — not at all;
Your gait's between a stagger and a sprawl.

Nor are you beautiful: your head's a snake's
To look at, and I do not doubt it aches.

As to your feet, they'd make an angel weep.
'Tis true you take them in whene'er you sleep.

No, you're not pretty, but you have, I own,
A certain firmness — mostly you're backbone.

Firmness and strength (you have a giant's thews)
Are virtues that the great know how to use —

I wish that they did not; yet, on the whole,
You lack — excuse my mentioning it — Soul.

So, to be candid, unreserved and true,
I'd rather you were I than I were you.

Perhaps, however, in a time to be,
When Man's extinct, a better world may see

Your progeny in power and control,
Due to the genesis and growth of Soul.

So I salute you as a reptile grand
Predestined to regenerate the land.

Father of Possibilities, O deign
To accept the homage of a dying reign!

In the far region of the unforeknown
I dream a tortoise upon every throne.

I see an Emperor his head withdraw
Into his carapace for fear of Law;

A King who carries something else than fat,
Howe'er acceptably he carries that;

A President not strenuously bent
On punishment of audible dissent —

Who never shot (it were a vain attack)
An armed or unarmed tortoise in the back;

Subjects and citizens that feel no need
To make the March of Mind a wild stampede;

All progress slow, contemplative, sedate,
And "Take your time" the word, in Church and State.

O Tortoise, 'tis a happy, happy dream,
My glorious testudinous régime!

I wish in Eden you'd brought this about
By slouching in and chasing Adam out.
(also: god)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

pumpkin spice

trustycoffeemug
a flavoring that is nigh omnipresent on food products in the western world between late summer and autumn. presumably there is some deep ritualistic significance behind this custom, though it remains doggedly beyond the understanding of our finest minds

originally used on pumpkins, a variety of pumpkin spiced watermelon

samhain

trustycoffeemug
the ancient gaelic harvest festival, held at the midpoint between the autumnal equinox and the winter solstice. by happenstance this causes the date to coincide with the modern holiday of halloween

the word would most properly be pronounced as "so-when," because the irish evidently just do not give a damn

sea hoes

tobitobi
Sea hoes is a word used to describe mermaids. They use their songs to lure people in. Because they want all that attention, they can be called sea hoes, rather than mermaids.

Example:

Dood1: Bro we're gonna get all the sea hoes

Dood2: yeah and we're gonna give them crabs

ridicule

the devils dictionary
Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who utters them. It may be graphic, mimetic or merely rident. Shaftesbury is quoted as having pronounced it the test of truth — a ridiculous assertion, for many a solemn fallacy has undergone centuries of ridicule with no abatement of its popular acceptance. What, for example, has been more valorously derided than the doctrine of Infant Respectability?
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

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