newtonian

the devils dictionary
Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when.

oceania

trustycoffeemug
(n.) planet earth's seventh continent, as long as one decides to list it seventh while counting, and which is not a continent, technically speaking (it's just australia, which *is* a continent, and all the other places in the pacific that don't belong to any others)

in addition to australia, oceania is usually considered to include
* micronesia (including kiribati, resting comfortably right on the international date line)
* melanesia (including papua new guinea and, like... I guess some places they might have used for filming in "survivor." anyone remember that show?)
* and polynesia (including new zealand, hawaii, samoa, and the delightful statue heads at easter island)

obsolete

the devils dictionary
No longer used by the timid. Said chiefly of words. A word which some lexicographer has marked obsolete is ever thereafter an object of dread and loathing to the fool writer, but if it is a good word and has no exact modern equivalent equally good, it is good enough for the good writer. Indeed, a writer's attitude toward "obsolete" words is as true a measure of his literary ability as anything except the character of his work. A dictionary of obsolete and obsolescent words would not only be singularly rich in strong and sweet parts of speech; it would add large possessions to the vocabulary of every competent writer who might not happen to be a competent reader.

severalty

the devils dictionary
Separateness, as, lands in severalty, i.e., lands held individually, not in joint ownership. Certain tribes of Indians are believed now to be sufficiently civilized to have in severalty the lands that they have hitherto held as tribal organizations, and could not sell to the Whites for waxen beads and potato whisky.

Lo! the poor Indian whose unsuited mind
Saw death before, hell and the grave behind;
Whom thrifty settlers ne'er besought to stay —
His small belongings their appointed prey;
Whom Dispossession, with alluring wile,
Persuaded elsewhere every little while!
His fire unquenched and his undying worm
By "land in severalty" (charming term!)
Are cooled and killed, respectively, at last,
And he to his new holding anchored fast!

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

noodles

trustycoffeemug
(n.) dough that's been shaped into long strands. a most versatile form of food.

supposedly invented by the chinese and then introduced to italians by marco polo. this supposition is untrue, but everyone will still say it anyway so you might as well

(also: pasta)

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