(adjective):
The blissful feeling that washes over you when the universe aligns perfectly, like finding a matching pair of socks on the first try or experiencing the elusive "plop" sound when plunging a clogged toilet.


(also: acting like it is not sexual)

although I am unable to rationalize your misfortune, perhaps God, with His infinite intelligence, might be able to rationalize it.

(n.) red pulsing thing in the chests of most animals, which keeps the blood flowing to the important bits. one of the more vocal organs, which strongly complains in times of great emotional turmoil or physical exercise

has toe beans
(also: toe beans)

Unable to leave.
(also: leaving the planet)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a vague hinting at some sort of unspecified imminent and preventable danger

(n.) a framework to evolve your ideas & your take on the world, commonly associated with Hegel.
a paradox is all three cleverly overlaid into one, as is a koan.

(also: paradox)
(also: koan)
(also: wisdom)
(also: humility)

(n.) 1) a foul play in the grand game of civilization. 2) that which cannot be further discussed without the consultation of a lawyer.

In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.
(also: cats)

The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly (Musca maledicta). The father of Zoölogy was Aristotle, as is universally conceded, but the name of its mother has not come down to us. Two of the science's most illustrious expounders were Buffon and Oliver Goldsmith, from both of whom we learn (L'Histoire générale des animaux and A History of Animated Nature) that the domestic cow sheds its horns every two years.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a possibly nonexistent place to which the soul will supposedly immigrate following death. in the west such a place would generally be referred to as heaven if it's a good place and hell if it's a bad one.

common three-leaved plant famous for sometimes having four leaves

An animal usually living in the vicinity of Man, and having a rudimentary susceptibility to domestication. It is credited by many of the elder zoölogists with a certain vestigial docility acquired in a former state of seclusion, but naturalists of the postsusananthony period, having no knowledge of the seclusion, deny the virtue and declare that such as creation's dawn beheld, it roareth now. The species is the most widely distributed of all beasts of prey, infesting all habitable parts of the globe, from Greenland's spicy mountains to India's moral strand. The popular name (wolf-man) is incorrect, for the creature is of the cat kind. The woman is lithe and graceful in its movements, especially the American variety (felis pugnans), is omnivorous and can be taught not to talk.
—Balthasar Pober
(also: man)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Certain abstentions.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) one who is in the business of producing lumber. for some reason this invariably involves wearing red flannel shirts and cultivating a beard like the guy in amityville horror

The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer.[hr
Youth is the true Saturnian Reign, the Golden Age on ea]th again, when figs are grown on thistles, and pigs betailed with whistles and, wearing silken bristles, live ever in clover, and cows fly over, delivering milk at every door, and Justice never is heard to snore, and every assassin is made a ghost and, howling, is cast into Baltimost!
—Polydore Smith
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A lawyer with a roving commission.


(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a real go-getter of a communicable disease

A book full of symbols that explain other symbols so the symbols that explain the symbols can have some meaning.

to lie motionless in a state of unconsciousness. Doctors recommend you spend about one third of your life sleeping