shark

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a razor-sharp grin attached to a large fish, with a dorsal fin to give fair warning

a crueler, land-based form of the animal prefers to swindle rather than outright eat its prey

digital watches

douglas adams
Odd little electronic devices worn around the wrist (or other convenient appendage). The apparent function of these instruments, is to determine the time of day, though their actual suitability for this purpose is somewhat questionable.

The problem is that the process of programming one is so insanely complicated and involves so much stress, anxiety and general irritation, by the time you have actually figured out how to set it to, say, 5:42 p.m. you are much more likely to cut off your hands at the wrists and dispose of them, watch and all, than do something so thick-witted as to actually wear it. For this reason most enlightened regions of the Galaxy have given up on the whole business, and they are now extremely hard to come by.

One of the few remaining civilizations still hanging on to this affectation is the planet Earth, whose ape-descended lifeforms still consider the digital a pretty neat idea.

(also: time)



death

dtoledo
All men are assured the first death, which is otherwise known as sleep, and then judgement. The second death is when The Lord no longer thinks of you and casts you into the fiery hell.

respite

the devils dictionary
A suspension of hostilities against a sentenced assassin, to enable the Executive to determine whether the murder may not have been done by the prosecuting attorney. Any break in the continuity of a disagreeable expectation.

Altgeld upon his incandescent bed
Lay, an attendant demon at his head.

"O cruel cook, pray grant me some relief —
Some respite from the roast, however brief."

"Remember how on earth I pardoned all
Your friends in Illinois when held in thrall."

"Unhappy soul! for that alone you squirm
O'er fire unquenched, a never-dying worm.

"Yet, for I pity your uneasy state,
Your doom I'll mollify and pains abate.

"Naught, for a season, shall your comfort mar,
Not even the memory of who you are."

Throughout eternal space dread silence fell;
Heaven trembled as Compassion entered Hell.

"As long, sweet demon, let my respite be
As, governing down here, I'd respite thee."

"As long, poor soul, as any of the pack
You thrust from jail consumed in getting back."

A genial chill affected Altgeld's hide
While they were turning him on t'other side.
—Joel Spate Woop
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

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