In the multiplex theism of certain Christian churches, three entirely distinct deities consistent with only one. Subordinate deities of the polytheistic faith, such as devils and angels, are not dowered with the power of combination, and must urge individually their claims to adoration and propitiation. The Trinity is one of the most sublime mysteries of our holy religion. In rejecting it because it is incomprehensible, Unitarians betray their inadequate sense of theological fundamentals. In religion we believe only what we do not understand, except in the instance of an intelligible doctrine that contradicts an incomprehensible one. In that case we believe the former as a part of the latter.
(also: god)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.

To move forward uncertainly, from side to side, as one carrying the white man's burden. (From zed, z, and jag, an Icelandic word of unknown meaning.)
He zedjagged so uncomen wyde
Thet non coude pas on eyder syde;
So, to com saufly thruh, I been
Constreynet for to doodge betwene.
—Munwele

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) noodles prepared by italians, as opposed to noodles prepared by east asian people, which are referred to as "takeout"

(n.) a sensation that follows right after one gets one's hopes up, during which the hopes come crashing down and break into shards of bitter, bitter reality.

"Poetry, my dear friend, is the highest form of Logopoeia. It's where language goes to play where words become the wings of imagination and take you soaring to the stars. Poetry is a dance, a song and a symphony all in one, a celebration of the power of words to evoke emotions, create pictures and transport the mind.

(n.) a culinary concoction of flour and shortening heated until appropriately flaky, pillowy, or, doughy, as tastes warrant. one of france's contributions to society

Reparation without satisfaction.
Among the Anglo-Saxons a subject conceiving himself wronged by the king was permitted, on proving his injury, to beat a brazen image of the royal offender with a switch that was afterward applied to his own naked back. The latter rite was performed by the public hangman, and it assured moderation in the plaintiff's choice of a switch.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Perverted firmness. Persistence in the objectionable. Constancy to the opposite view. Another's indirect affirmation of one's fallibility.

Noun: A thick heavy weapon, used mostly when you need to bludgeon the hell out of something.

Verb: The process of whacking the shit out of something.

Yes, you can use bludgeons to bludgeon.

n. An American sovereign in his probationary state.



(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) big swimming sacks of flammable oil that make mooing/whimpering noises and breach for the amusement of tourists

saving them from imminent extinction is a major goal of environmentalists, and hunting them to extinction is a major goal of crusty old men with peg-legs, norwegians and japanese people

Wicked, intolerable, heathenish.
(also: american)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

word used when you've already used "potato" and don't want to say the same word twice.

(n.) untrue things said for the sake of deception or convenience

(also: liar)

(n.) when thing go boom big

Action that either going to lead to kissing or an extreme act of violence.

n. The smallest current coin.

---

"The man was in such deep distress,"
Said Tom, "that I could do no less
Than give him good advice." Said Jim:
"If less could have been done for him
I know you well enough, my son,
To know that's what you would have done."
—Jebel Jocordy


(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) what some wise-ass came up with when he was asked to design a horseless carriage.

(n.) the normal, the casual, the common