the roman world was in a mess; the emperor caused no end of stress
then in the year four-forty-one, there came this guy, attila the hun
run away! Here comes attila
flee today! he'll sack your villa
can't you see? he's come to kill ya
swipe your bed, and then your pilla
attila was a nasty king; he and his huns wrecked everything
he lived by arson and the sword, burned down france cuz he got bored
run away! here comes attila
far away! go to manilla
kills more people than godzilla
swipes your sheets and then your pilla
to a wedding attila went, looking sharp like a hunnish gent
made a quick speech, went to bed; very next morning, was found dead
fare thee well, goodbye attila
bury him deep neath the rolling hillas
he wore shorts made of chinchilla
his favorite ice cream was strawberry

(n.) Shaping and then baking clay at a high temperature to create hard containers, and Link's mortal enemy.
(also: poetry)

(n.) a complex thingy made of various interconnected bits of stuff. the web of a spider is made of silken strands strewn in a net-shape between tree branches and other detritus. the web of political intrigue is made of backstabs and power-grabs strewn between taxpayer dollars.

alternatively, "web" may also be a distinctly radical way of saying "the internet."

(n.) a thief, plunderer, and brigand who is afforded more than the usual amount of respect and acclaim because their various offenses are performed while on a boat

(n.) a middle tier tyrant, above school principals but below agents of the government; roughly on the same level as a landlord but ruling at a place of work rather than domestic environment.

a neutral political stance sitting between the extremes of egalitarian not-quite-free-market bureaucratic republicanism and not-quite-egalitarian free-market bureaucratic republicanism

Undergoing or awaiting punishment.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) the haunting knowledge that one has done something wrong despite their better judgment; generally a deterrent against future wrongdoing until the individual forgets about it

(also: shame)

Well, I'm not telling *you...*

(n.) the people or groups of people in charge of running things, or in charge of preventing things from running for safety reasons. The Man.

One of several musical prodigies famous for a vain attempt to dissuade Odysseus from a life on the ocean wave. Figuratively, any lady of splendid promise, dissembled purpose and disappointing performance.
(also: war)

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A senseless thing that holds food without eating it.

---

She uttered her mind, without ceasing:
And this is the thought that it carried.
"I fear that your love is decreasing.
How is it, dear, now that we're married?"

Replied that aciduous sinner,
Fatigued of her reasonless chatter:
"When a fellow has eaten his dinner
He doesn't make love to the platter"
—Belijah H. Bimbee
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(1881-1955) Scottish biologist who discovered penicillin.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: alexander fleming quotes)

A human between the age of 0 and 12 is considered a child. These creatures are also known as: “Devil”, “Asspain” & “Brats”

A picture painted by the sun without instruction in art. It is a little better than the work of an Apache, but not quite so good as that of a Cheyenne.
(also: PHONOGRAPH)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a feline predator of africa and southern asia, of a spotty complexion.

the occasional leopard with one very large all-over black spot is referred to as a black panther

(n.) a way of saying "creature" with an excess of saccharine folksy American charm

A sack of membrane covering a multitude of sins.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

charles bukowski: the man, the poet, the big big drinker.
and he will tell you to reinvent yourself,

and to go through your own struggles, rather than seeking approval from someone like him.

The worst part of an egg

(also: egg)