n. An African animal having three horns, two on the head and one on the nape of the neck by which to hang up the carcass after the head has been removed. In those varieties that are not hunted by man, this third horn is imperfectly developed or wholly wanting.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

. In ancient Rome, a definite, formal pageant in honor of one who had been disserviceable to the enemies of the nation. A lesser "triumph." In modern English the word is improperly used to signify any loose and spontaneous expression of popular homage to the hero of the hour and place.

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"I had an ovation!" the actor man said,
But I thought it uncommonly queer,
That people and critics by him had been led
By the ear.

The Latin lexicon makes his absurd
Assertion as plain as a peg;
In "ovum" we find the true root of the word.
It means egg.
—Dudley Spink

(adj.) being thus and no other.
free. total.

(also: purify)
(also: purgе)
(also: purgatory)

(n.) a horse from the wrong side of the tracks, which grew up meaner and could not afford scoliosis treatment

(noun):
Hilariously disastrous stories that make you question humanity's ability to navigate the simplest of tasks, like opening a door or using a toaster without setting the house on fire.

(also: tales from pizza guy)

Literally, the Place of All the Demons. Most of them have escaped into politics and finance, and the place is now used as a lecture hall by the Audible Reformer. When disturbed by his voice the ancient echoes clamor appropriate responses most gratifying to his pride of distinction.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

n. A mealtime inversion that delights the palate and confuses the digestive system.

(also: Breakfast)

(1831-1879) Scottish physicist. Maxwell made a significant contribution to understanding electromagnetism
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: james clerk maxwell quotes)

a form of music once popular in cuba, generally characterized by quick pace, jaunty drums, bells, flute and violin sounds. usually meant to be accompanied by salsa dancing. goes down great with cocaine, one assumes

sort of the spanish tarantella

Incredibly good Swedish band led by mathematician composer papa Emeritus IV. The names of other band members - the Nameless ghouls - are secret. Former lead guitarist Omega however, revealed his identity after leaving the bandand founding Magna Carta Cartel. Their music overcombines many different instruments, genres and effects

(also: Thobias Forge)

(n.) a boss-man or pooh-bah, usually in sinister secret societies or chess clubs

An abstract word with a negative connotation, long on power, short on truth. An obscene mask painted on the mean face of a shrewd vulgarian for the purpose of dominating the multitude of sentimentalist idiots and imbeciles.

(n.) a fruit hailing from southeast asia and oceania, known for its beguilingly-elongated, whimsically-curved shape, and the ease with which its rind can be removed. actually neither of those qualities exists within natural, grown-in-the-wild bananas; both were engineered into the fruit by godless human meddling.

common cartoon knowledge holds the banana to be a favorite repast of the monkey.

(n.) a comic presented to its audience through the power of the web. the web provides a platform on which comics need not be subject to the gimlet eye and cruel iron fist of the newspaper syndicate, thus freeing webcomic creators to fully realize their true creative vision (usually furry porn)

(n.) a mythical figure associated with the christian solstice holiday; a figure of terror who embodies wretched material excess while engaging in breaking-and-entering and contemptuous neglect of international borders

Santa Claus for adults

(eref: #101)

(n.) a nauseating, slimy, greasy substance with a haunting fecal odor, processed from gunk extracted from the guts of whales. Naturally used to manufacture expensive perfumes.

a supposed king of england who supposedly ruled around the time the roman empire had withdrawn from the country in the late fifth century. supposedly.

known for being conceived by 'magical' rape-by-fraud, hanging out with wizards, pulling a sword out of a big rock, conquering a number of european places, being cuckolded by a frenchman, trying to drown hundreds of children, and finally getting killed by the one child he didn't manage to drown

although he probably did not actually exist, he is much better known than a majority of real english historical figures