(n.) someone trained to operate aboard a spacecraft, braving such dangers as the pitiless vacuum of space, the burning agony of unshielded radiation, the wasting-away of their bone and muscle mass, and the existential agony that accompanies total realization of one's insignificance in the grand scheme of things, all in the hopes of exploring totally uninhabitable places with generally little in the way of mineral wealth.

astronauts may be said to blur the line between courageous heroism and flagrant stupidity

(n.) a great big pretty boat with sails and navigation tools and a cargo hold and cabins where unspeakable things happen.

a process of converting someone to a specific belief, perspective, or series of behavior processes. These methods vary by culture, and by government. an ancient alien race known as the reapers may or may not be the originators of these complex and multi-faceted techniques of behavior (and thought) modification.

(also: military)
(also: minecraft)

n. Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.

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M is for Moses,
Who slew the Egyptian.
As sweet as a rose is
The meekness of Moses.
No monument shows his
Post-mortem inscription,
But M is for Moses
Who slew the Egyptian.
—The Biographical Alphabet

(also: the devil's dictionary)
(also: revenge)
(also: sheep)

To remit a penalty and restore to a life of crime. To add to the lure of crime the temptation of ingratitude.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others

“When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they can seem invincible, but in the end, they always fall. Think of it--always.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
(also: Gandhi)

(n.) a food that is conceptually disgusting but inherently fancy and respectable

“Because paper has more patience than people. ”
― Anne Frank

Letters indicating the degree Legumptionorum Doctor, one learned in laws, gifted with legal gumption. Some suspicion is cast upon this derivation by the fact that the title was formerly ££.d., and conferred only upon gentlemen distinguished for their wealth. At the date of this writing Columbia University is considering the expediency of making another degree for clergymen, in place of the old D.D. — Damnator Diaboli. The new honor will be known as Sanctorum Custos, and written $$.¢. The name of the Rev. John Satan has been suggested as a suitable recipient by a lover of consistency, who points out that Professor Harry Thurston Peck has long enjoyed the advantage of a degree.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Bill Nye Day (n.) a kind of day when you don't feel like doing your job. When you walk into the classroom and the TV is in the room and lights are off, you know it's going to be a bill nye day. Bill Nye is a kid's show scientist, which many only watched in school on these kind of days.

A nation in which, the thing governing and the thing governed being the same, there is only a permitted authority to enforce an optional obedience. In a republic the foundation of public order is the ever lessening habit of submission inherited from ancestors who, being truly governed, submitted because they had to. There are as many kinds of republics as there are gradations between the despotism whence they came and the anarchy whither they lead.
(also: governing people)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a statement that is not sufficiently dissenting

An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance. Discovery of truth is the sole purpose of philosophy, which is the most ancient occupation of the human mind and has a fair prospect of existing with increasing activity to the end of time.
(also: truthful)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(also: humans)

(n.) speaking back and forth to other people.

Despite the frustratingly complex rules involved, it's not usually considered a sport, possibly because nobody bothers remembering how to score.

A file provided for the teeth of the rats of reform. The number of plans for its abolition equals that of the reformers who suffer from it, plus that of the philosophers who know nothing about it. Its victims are distinguished by possession of all the virtues and by their faith in leaders seeking to conduct them into a prosperity where they believe these to be unknown.
(also: leaving the planet)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

* Because one wishes to express animosity towards another
* Because one wishes to emphasize a more casual company in which strict etiquette need not be adhered to and offense need not be taken
* Because one knows full well the other person will be in their company so often that NOT forgiving disrespect would become tedious

In the Church of England, the Third Person of the parochial Trinity, the Curate and the Vicar being the other two.
(also: university)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(adverb): A word that means the opposite of "yes" but is often used ironically to actually mean "yes". Because why be straightforward when you can make people guess?