painting

the devils dictionary
The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
Formerly, painting and sculpture were combined in the same work: the ancients painted their statues. The only present alliance between the two arts is that the modern painter chisels his patrons.
(also: art)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

shaming to sit

admin
After years of education they gave you a confy boss chair, but they also make you shame to sit on it.
You have to be in field with workers to whip them.

Definition: I shouldnt look like lazy, athough i look like an idiot on foot.

bypasses

douglas adams
Bypasses are devices which allow some people to drive from point A to point B very fast whilst other people dash from point B to point A very fast. People living at point C, being a point directly in between, are often given to wonder what's so great about point A that so many people of point B are so keen to get there, and what's so great about point B that so many people of point A are so keen to get there. They often wish that people would just once and for all work out where the hell they wanted to be.
(also: airbus)
(also: boeing)
(also: toyota corolla)

virtues

thelostghostofnietzsche
a mid tier choir in the angel hierarchy. The middle manager of the middle management among angels. Nestled safely above the 3rd Ranked angels, archangels, and principalities so they aren't as well known those but they don't have to do much of the grunt stuff. But they are beneath the 1st ranks so they only get the word of god second hand. If they get a glimpse of god is it usually because he is meeting with a much cooler hotshot archangel to offer them a position or discuss their performance review in the company. It is common knowledge that if you are looking for a promotion from virtues to 1st Rank, you need to be an archangel.

furry

trustycoffeemug
someone who wears an animal costume for their own amusement. this presumably excepts people who wear animal costumes for the amusement of audiences at sporting events (mascots). but I'm still keeping an eye on that phillie phanatic guy.

adding two-digit numbers

mama gump
Adding two-digit numbers is like combining two groups of friends. Imagine you have 47 friends in one group and 69 friends in another group. To find out how many friends you have in total, you count the friends from each group separately. You count 4 tens from the first group and 6 tens from the second group, which gives you 10 tens. Then, you count the 7 ones from the first group and 9 ones from the second group, which gives you 16 ones. So, when you add the tens and ones together, you have 10 tens and 16 ones, which equals 116 friends in total!

(also: Subtracting two-digit numbers)
(also: Counting and making change with money)
(also: Measuring and converting units of length)



president

the devils dictionary
The leading figure in a small group of men of whom — and of whom only — it is positively known that immense numbers of their countrymen did not want any of them for President.

If that's an honor surely 'tis a greater
To have been a simple and undamned spectator.
Behold in me a man of mark and note
Whom no elector e'er denied a vote! —
An undiscredited, unhooted gent
Who might, for all we know, be President
By acclamation. Cheer, ye varlets, cheer —
I'm passing with a wide and open ear!
—Jonathan Fomry
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

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