The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

the monarchy
the royal family of france (boo). spent their time blowing money on big castles and eating cake in a time of famine; understandably, many in france had decided they wanted them gone. in the grand game of revolution, they were more or less the ball being kicked around by other factions. but that's no reason to lose your head.

the sans-culottes
the masses of dispossessed and discontent in paris leading up to the revolution. their name is an indicator of how badly off they were, as it means they could not afford the fancier kinds of pants (which looked like crap and which nobody wears nowadays anyway). their popular movement was the irresistible tide which carried other factions into government as the final traces of the old rule were wiped away.

jacobins
a radical anti-monarchist political club which had numerous members in france's national assembly. when the blood had settled, the jacobins were the dominant force in france (this didn't last). famous jacobins included mirabeau and robespierre.

girondins
a faction that appealed to the provincial nobility outside of paris. they started as a somewhat more moderate wing of the jacobins until robespierre forced them out for being *too* moderate. one of the more famous girondins was charlotte corday, who liked killing people while they bathed.

cordeliers
among the most extreme factions in play during the revolution, calling for such radical reforms as universal suffrage and democracy. like the girondins, they lost significant power leading up to the revolution and the remaining members were declared public enemies by the jacobins after that. famous cordeliers include danton (a big ugly buff guy), marat (who liked getting killed by women while he was bathing), and hébert (one of those guys who died by ironic guillotine)

A mechanical marvel, that is powered by a mighty mainspring, which sends power through, typically, 4 gears and their pinions to a finely tuned balance. All that only to tell you the time of day.
Many watches also possess extra functions (or complications) such as:
-stopwatches (chronographs)
-showing the current date
-the ever beloved automatic winding of the mainspring

Though not as needed in the current times, they still are beautiful constructs, used to show status, or just to look nice.

(also: digital watches)
(also: time)

My Little Pony, or MLP, is a TV show born in the 1980s, though in the modern day it's much better known for its fourth generation and the interesting fandom born around it.

a metaphorical infidel who worships something as one would worship a god, but not as one would worship like MY god

The loss of one's soul; also the place in which it can be found.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

series of letters of decreasing size that you could certainly memorize. Every eye chart is the same sequence, and it's only 66 letters.

(n.) big swimming sacks of flammable oil that make mooing/whimpering noises and breach for the amusement of tourists

saving them from imminent extinction is a major goal of environmentalists, and hunting them to extinction is a major goal of crusty old men with peg-legs, norwegians and japanese people

Place to sweat and beat oneself with a birch whip. You're probably doing it wrong. If you want to do it right, move to Finland.

title used for royal lawyer-knights

n. A food miraculously given to the Israelites in the wilderness. When it was no longer supplied to them they settled down and tilled the soil, fertilizing it, as a rule, with the bodies of the original occupants.
(also: the devils dictionary)

The final arbiter in international disputes. Formerly these disputes were settled by physical contact of the disputants, with such simple arguments as the rudimentary logic of the times could supply — the sword, the spear and so forth. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous. Its capital defect is that it requires personal attendance at the point of propulsion.

(n.) the quintessential hymenopteran insect, the most recognizable variety of bee is a small bombinating ball of fuzz colored in yellow and black. the bee is known for its diligence, its ecological value as a pollinator, its utility to humans as a producer of honey, wax, and other products, and its use of kamikaze tactics when threatened.

if you think we can get by without these fellas then you must bee crazy

Butcher
(also: butcher)

The purchase of that which neither belongs to the seller, nor can belong to the buyer. The most unprofitable of investments.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A tall building on the seashore in which the government maintains a lamp and the friend of a politician.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a food that is conceptually disgusting but inherently fancy and respectable

(n.) a variety of music that gives one the impression of being bearhugged by a fat, friendly bavarian even when none are present

n. A small metal disk given as a reward for virtues, attainments or services more or less authentic.
It is related of Bismarck, who had been awarded a medal for gallantly rescuing a drowning person, that, being asked the meaning of the medal, he replied: "I save lives sometimes." And sometimes he didn't.
(also: war)
(also: sports)
(also: the devils dictionary)

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
― Albert Einstein
(also: Albert Einstein)