morning

the devils dictionary
n. The end of night and dawn of dejection. The morning was discovered by a Chaldean astronomer, who, finding his observation of the stars unaccountably interrupted, diligently sought the cause and found it. After several centuries of disputation, morning was generally accepted by the scientific as a reasonable cause of the interruption and a constantly recurrent natural phenomenon.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

hodag

trustycoffeemug
a legendary monster made up by the people of far-off wisconsin in a desperate attempt to convince people to go there and buy merchandise. clear parallels can be detected between the aliens supposedly seen in roswell, new mexico; mothman in parts of west virginia; and leonardo dicaprio in hollywood.

in any case, supposedly the hodag looks a bit like someone added a lot of spikes and fangs to a bull.

newtonian

the devils dictionary
Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when.

preside

the devils dictionary
To guide the action of a deliberative body to a desirable result. In Journalese, to perform upon a musical instrument; as, "He presided at the piccolo."

The Headliner, holding the copy in hand,
Read with a solemn face:
"The music was very uncommonly grand —
The best that was ever provided,
For our townsman Brown presided
At the organ with skill and grace."
The Headliner discontinued to read,
And, spreading the paper down
On the desk, he dashed in at the top of the screed:
"Great playing by President Brown."
—Orpheus Bowen
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

toothpick

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a small tree able to be held between two fingers, used to scrape leftovers from between your teeth or debris from other hard-to-reach spaces.

... usually it is considered a bad idea to do both with the same toothpick.

self awareness

kivi
(noun):
The mind's ability to take a step back and observe itself, resulting in a profound realization that you are, in fact, stuck inside your own head. It's like discovering an inner narrator who constantly comments on your thoughts, actions, and embarrassing moments.

(also: Realizing you're stuck)

red

boo
/rɛd/ (adj.):
A hue resembling a ripe tomato or a Marxist manifesto. Also used to describe a balance sheet that's "in the red," which is financial jargon for "totally screwed."

ceramics

polaris
The process by which hardened figurines and statues are created, beginning with brown goop and ending with a finished, painted, ceramic object.

Most commonly seen in the form of illuminated trees and piggy banks, though nearly anything can be found in a ceramic form.

bacon

kivi
Bacon is simply the best part of the pig, in my opinion. It is salt cured, often smoked, and usually from the belly. The fatty belly pieces are just amazing and can be used in so many ways. I like to grill or fry bacon, and use it in sandwiches, bacon & egg and other breakfast combinations, wrapped around grilled scallops, as a topping for grilled oysters, etc. I much prefer it in decent sized slices, not bacon bits, but bacon bits do have their uses, e.g. in salad.

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