n. One who worships at the shrine of his ancestral cell
(also: list of all isms)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down 'happy'. They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life.”
― John Lennon
(author: John Lennon)

A receptacle for such sacred objects as pieces of the true cross, short-ribs of the saints, the ears of Balaam's ass, the lung of the cock that called Peter to repentance and so forth. Reliquaries are commonly of metal, and provided with a lock to prevent the contents from coming out and performing miracles at unseasonable times. A feather from the wing of the Angel of the Annunciation once escaped during a sermon in Saint Peter's and so tickled the noses of the congregation that they woke and sneezed with great vehemence three times each. It is related in the Gesta Sanctorum that a sacristan in the Canterbury cathedral surprised the head of Saint Dennis in the library. Reprimanded by its stern custodian, it explained that it was seeking a body of doctrine. This unseemly levity so enraged the diocesan that the offender was publicly anathematized, thrown into the Stour and replaced by another head of Saint Dennis, brought from Rome.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a phenomenon that blesses only the most dedicated. to know you have truly suffered in this life, your reward is the physical evidence of your suffering.

seafaring gentlemen of the nordic persuasion circa the ninth and tenth centuries, who made their living pillaging and raiding and reaving and so on

today remembered either as savage unwashed brutes or as admirable noble savage types (mostly by fans of heavy metal)

An army of words escorting a corporal of thought.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

n. A stronghold of provincialism.
(also: list of all isims)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) with your eyes closed and your mind resting, you just might link to the OG.

(also: dreams)
(also: default mode network)

n. An attribute beloved of detected offenders.
(also: the fool)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a politician who is both good and bad, which is worse than bad, because it messes up your classification scheme.

a sport involving fighting from Eastern Asia. While sports such as boxing and wrestling do involve fighting, they are not from Eastern Asia, and are thus not classified as martial arts

v.t. To rebuke with stones. St. Stephen, for example, was lapidated like a Chinaman.

---

Lamented St. Steve,
What Christian can grieve
For the way that you came to your death?
For the monument fair
Of memorial stones
Was reared in the air
O'er your honored bones
Ere yet you'd relinquished your breath.
No doubt as your soul exhaled
You were thanked by resolution;
For the builders' design had failed
Except for your execution.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(also: infinity)

n. A useful functionary, not infrequently found editing a newspaper. In his character of editor he is closely allied to the blackmailer by the tie of occasional identity; for in truth the lickspittle is only the blackmailer under another aspect, although the latter is frequently found as an independent species. Lickspittling is more detestable than blackmailing, precisely as the business of a confidence man is more detestable than that of a highway robber; and the parallel maintains itself throughout, for whereas few robbers will cheat, every sneak will plunder if he dare.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) buffoonery or clowning-around

sucks to be tom, i guess

The faithful attendant and follower of Punishment. It is usually manifest in a degree of reformation that is not inconsistent with continuity of sin.

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Desirous to avoid the pains of Hell,
You will repent and join the Church, Parnell?
How needless! — Nick will keep you off the coals
And add you to the woes of other souls.
—Jomater Abemy
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(1870 – 1924) Leader of the Russian Revolution and new Communist regime from 1917 to 1924.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: lenin quotes)

Any disagreeable act, considered from the viewpoint of the victim of it. A denial of immunity

a continent includes china japan and korea.

(n.) one whose newfangled ideas indicate the imminent collapse of all proud and decent society, society evidently being constantly threatened by newfangled ideas