saint

the devils dictionary
A dead sinner revised and edited.
The Duchess of Orleans relates that the irreverent old calumniator, Marshal Villeroi, who in his youth had known St. Francis de Sales, said, on hearing him called saint: "I am delighted to hear that Monsieur de Sales is a saint. He was fond of saying indelicate things, and used to cheat at cards. In other respects he was a perfect gentleman, though a fool."

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

land

the devils dictionary
n. A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society, and is eminently worthy of the superstructure. Carried to its logical conclusion, it means that some have the right to prevent others from living; for the right to own implies the right exclusively to occupy; and in fact laws of trespass are enacted wherever property in land is recognized. It follows that if the whole area of terra firma is owned by A, B and C, there will be no place for D, E, F and G to be born, or, born as trespassers, to exist.

A life on the ocean wave,
A home on the rolling deep,
For the spark that nature gave
I have there the right to keep.

They give me the cat-o'-nine
Whenever I go ashore.
Then ho! for the flashing brine —
I'm a natural commodore!
—Dodle

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

new york

douglas adams
(n.) a city
In the winter time the temperature falls well below the legal minimum, or rather it would do if anybody had the common sense to set a legal minimum. The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.

In the summer it's too darn hot. It's one thing to be the sort of life form that thrives on heat and finds, as the Frastrans do, that the temperature range between 40,000 and 40,004 is very equable, but it's quite another to be the sort of animal that has to wrap itself up in lots of other animals at one point in your planet's orbit, and then find, half an orbit later, that your skin's bubbling.

Spring is over-rated. A lot of the inhabitants of New York will honk on mightily about the pleasures of spring, but if they actually knew the first thing about the pleasures of spring they would know of at least five thousand nine hundred and eighty three better places to spend it than New York, and that's just on the same latitude.

Fall, though, is the worst. Few things are worse than fall in New York. Some of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats would disagree, but most of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats are highly disagreeable anyway, so their opinion can and should be discounted. When it's fall in New York, the air smells as if someone's been frying goats in it, and if you are keen to breathe, the best plan is to open a window and stick your head in a building.

(also: new orleans)

looking-glass

the devils dictionary
n. A vitreous plane upon which to display a fleeting show for man's disillusion given.
The King of Manchuria had a magic looking-glass, whereon whoso looked saw, not his own image, but only that of the king. A certain courtier who had long enjoyed the king's favor and was thereby enriched beyond any other subject of the realm, said to the king: "Give me, I pray, thy wonderful mirror, so that when absent out of thine august presence I may yet do homage before thy visible shadow, prostrating myself night and morning in the glory of thy benign countenance, as which nothing has so divine splendor, O Noonday Sun of the Universe!"

Pleased with the speech, the king commanded that the mirror be conveyed to the courtier's palace; but after, having gone thither without apprisal, he found it in an apartment where was naught but idle lumber. And the mirror was dimmed with dust and overlaced with cobwebs. This so angered him that he fisted it hard, shattering the glass, and was sorely hurt. Enraged all the more by this mischance, he commanded that the ungrateful courtier be thrown into prison, and that the glass be repaired and taken back to his own palace; and this was done. But when the king looked again on the mirror he saw not his image as before, but only the figure of a crowned ass, having a bloody bandage on one of its hinder hooves—as the artificers and all who had looked upon it had before discerned but feared to report. Taught wisdom and charity, the king restored his courtier to liberty, had the mirror set into the back of the throne and reigned many years with justice and humility; and one day when he fell asleep in death while on the throne, the whole court saw in the mirror the luminous figure of an angel, which remains to this day.

(also: life lessons from boomers)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

graverobbing

trustycoffeemug
one of the less savory human avocations, the act of graverobbing amounts to theft of a corpse or its sundry accoutrements from their proper place of internment.

graverobbing has been an epidemic concern at various points in history. for example, in egypt, even in ancient times (when it was better known as ancient egypt), the elaborate tombs of pharaohs were tempting targets for taphological treasure-hunting transgressors, who would seek to pillage not only the gold ornaments with which pharaohs were buried, but also occasionally the mummies themselves (apparently they were considered to have medicinal purposes. mmm, human jerky)

graverobbing was also a source of concern in victorian england, as the need for fresh corpses for medical research (and lack of willing donors) left doctors' associations with little other recourse but to accept stolen cadavers, maintaining plausible deniability by not asking too many questions.

graverobbing may strike the reader as callous, heartless, and reprehensible, but the open-minded among us should remember, you can't take it with you

zeus

the devils dictionary
The chief of Grecian gods, adored by the Romans as Jupiter and by the modern Americans as God, Gold, Mob and Dog. Some explorers who have touched upon the shores of America, and one who professes to have penetrated a considerable distance to the interior, have thought that these four names stand for as many distinct deities, but in his monumental work on Surviving Faiths, Frumpp insists that the natives are monotheists, each having no other god than himself, whom he worships under many sacred names.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

list of hobbies

lister
general hobbies

3D printing
Acroyoga
Acting
Aerial silk
Airbrushing
Amateur radio
Animation
Aquascaping
Art
Astrology
Babysitting
Baking
Basketball
Baton twirling
Beatboxing
Beer tasting
Binge-watching
Blogging
Board/tabletop games
Book discussion clubs
Book restoration
Bowling
Brazilian jiu-jitsu
Breadmaking
Bullet journaling
Calligraphy
Candle making
Candy making
Car fixing & building
Card games
Cardistry
Ceramics
Chatting
Cheesemaking
Chess
Cleaning
Clothesmaking
Coffee roasting
Collecting
Coloring
Communication
Community activism
Computer programming
Confectionery
Conlanging
Construction
Cooking
Cosplaying
Couch surfing
Couponing
Craft
Creative writing
Crocheting
Cross-stitch
Crossword puzzles
Cryptography
Cue sports
Dance
Decorating
Digital arts
Dining
Diorama
Distro Hopping
Diving
Djembe
DJing
Do it yourself
Drama
Drawing
Drink mixing
Electronic games
Electronics
Embroidery
Engraving
Entertaining
Experimenting
Fantasy sports
Fashion
Fashion design
Feng shui decorating
Filmmaking
Fingerpainting
Fishfarming
Fishkeeping
Flower arranging
Fly tying
Foreign language learning
Furniture building
Gaming
Genealogy
Gingerbread house making
Giving advice
Glassblowing
Gardening
Gongfu tea
Graphic design
Gunsmithing
Gymnastics
Hacking
Hardware
Herp keeping
Home improvement
Homebrewing
Houseplant care
Hula hooping
Humor
Hydroponics
Ice skating
Inventing
Jewelry making
Jigsaw puzzles
Journaling
Juggling
Karaoke
Karate
Kendama
Knife making
Knitting
Knot tying
Kombucha brewing
Kung fu
Lace making
Lapidary
Leather crafting
Lego building
Livestreaming
Listening to music
Listening to podcasts
Lock picking
Machining
Macrame
Magic
Makeup
Manga
Massaging
Mazes
Mechanics
Meditation
Memory training
Metalworking
Miniature art
Minimalism
Model building
Model engineering
Music
Nail art
Needlepoint
Origami
Painting
Palmistry
Pen Spinning
Performance
Pet
Pet adoption & fostering
Pet sitting
Philately
Photography
Pilates
Planning
Plastic art
Playing musical instruments
Poetry
Poi
Pole dancing
Postcrossing
Pottery
Powerlifting
Practical jokes
Pressed flower craft
Proofreading and editing
Proverbs
Public speaking
Puppetry
Puzzles
Pyrography
Quilling
Quilting
Quizzes
Radio-controlled model playing
Rail transport modeling
Rapping
Reading
Recipe creation
Refinishing
Reiki
Reviewing Gadgets
Robot combat
Rubik's Cube
Scrapbooking
Scuba Diving
Sculpting
Sewing
Shoemaking
Singing
Sketching
Skipping rope
Slot car
Soapmaking
Social media
Spreadsheets
Sleeping
Stamp collecting
Stand-up comedy
Storytelling
Stripping
Sudoku
Table tennis playing
Talking
Tapestry
Tarot
Tatebanko
Tattooing
Taxidermy
Telling jokes
Thrifting
Upcycling
Video editing
Video game developing
Video gaming
Video making
VR Gaming
Wargaming
Watch making
Watching documentaries
Watching movies
Watching television
Wax sealing
Waxing
Weaving
Webtooning
Weight training
Welding
Whisky
Whittling
Wikipedia editing
Wine tasting
Winemaking
Witchcraft
Wood carving
Woodworking
Word searches
Worldbuilding
Writing
Writing music
Yo-yoing
Yoga
Zumba


Outdoors and Sports

Air sports
Airsoft
Amateur geology
Amusement park visiting
Archery
Auto detailing
Automobilism
Astronomy
Backpacking
Badminton
BASE jumping
Baseball
Basketball
Beachcombing
Beekeeping
Birdwatching
Blacksmithing
BMX
Board sports
Bodybuilding
Bonsai
Butterfly watching
Bus riding
Camping
Canoeing
Canyoning
Car riding
Car tuning
Caving
City trip
Climbing
Composting
Croquet
Cycling
Dandyism
Dog training
Dog walking
Dowsing
Driving
Farming
Fishing
Flag football
Flower growing
Flying
Flying disc
Flying model planes
Foraging
Fossicking
Freestyle football
Fruit picking
Gardening
Geocaching
Ghost hunting


Collection hobbies


Educational hobbies


Competitive hobbies


Observation hobbies






to be continued

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