“Old men make wars. Young men fight them.”


“Women, honor and resources. These are reasons for why wars are fought.”

the purported secretive cabal consisting of key influential individuals in the many halls of power, and which engineers globally insidious undertakings of all descriptions, including the activities of satanic cults, the cia, the military, ancient egyptians, atlantis, alien invaders, the entertainment industry, the pharmaceutical industry, the arms industry, the confectionery industry, unhinged lone wolf assassins, the knights templar, your mom, french revolutionaries, freemasons, and underappreciated webcartoonists of the 2010s who just sort of stopped updating with no warning one day.

... but not coofl. definitely not coofl.

(n.) sadness which has an almost crippling effect

probably the force that led you to this online dictionary

(n.) with rays of light stretching out like a million helping hands.





(also: egypt)
(also: gods and goddesses)
(also: multi-headed)
(also: multi-handed)

(also: typo) (should have been just 'egypt sun god')
(also: but is it though)
(also: no such thing as a coincidence)
(also: seek and ye shall find)
(also: tumblr tag style)
(also: never used tumblr in my life)

Calepine of Outré Fringe Linguistics

The quickest way to end an argument.

n. In the nature of an unprivileged excommunication.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(adjective):
A term used liberally by self-important individuals to describe the most mundane of accomplishments, as if they single-handedly discovered a cure for boredom or invented a revolutionary way to tie shoelaces. It's like witnessing someone pat themselves on the back for successfully opening a jar of pickles or managing to walk and chew gum simultaneously. Groundbreaking moments in the realm of exaggeration often involve feats of mind-boggling mediocrity, leaving the rest of us scratching our heads and wondering if we missed the memo on what constitutes actual progress.

(n.) the one who transforms the leader and first follower from weirdos, to the beginnings of a crowd

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
― Winston S. Churchill
(also: Winston Churchill)

the secret salvation test. as it is written, "the smash you give is the smash you shall receive"

(also: smash)

a religion that is not big enough to be dogmatic, but refuses to stay in its lane as independent spirituality until it becomes big enough.

noun: a person coping with his (or her) childhood trauma by inadvertently choosing people who do not look out for his (or her) interest and thus, may be perceived as either naive or unintelligent due to outside perspectives that his (or her) decisions were misguided and unwise.
example: Over time, many people who are depressed or anxious can overcome their johnnydepp mindset.

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noun: a person whose coping mechanisms cause him/her to be prone to creating/engaging in emotionally draining situations.
example: Teenagers tend to be johnnydepps because they want to fit in.

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noun: a person who is perceived as a victim whether or not he/she has good intentions to help people
example: Mr.Bentley was a johnnydepp because he donated millions to charity, but people still chastised him for spending his money irresponsibly.

A period of leisure, which, when looked at closely, often consists of aimlessly scrolling through social media feeds and refreshing emails, interspersed with fleeting moments of productivity that are quickly overshadowed by feelings of guilt and self-doubt.

It is a peculiar phenomenon that one can simultaneously feel both bored and overwhelmed during free time, as if the endless possibilities of what to do next are both too many and too mundane.

one who is having a bad time, forcing you to sympathize

A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
(also: revolution)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Feeling that you can't force.
You can only stalk and hope for the best.

ptolemy i soter (367-282 BC) was a doofy-looking greek man who served as a military commander under alexander the great, for which he was made satrap (governor) of egypt, starting a new greek dynasty over the whole country (as well as other bits of the levant). he also responsible for establishing the musaium, the great library and university at alexandria.

following alexander's somewhat mysterious death while on campaign in babylon, ptolemy was on hand to have the conqueror's body taken to alexandria to be properly buried, which would have been read, by the custom of the time, as a declaration that he was alexander's "real, for true" successor (and it's rumored by some that he might have been alexander's illegitimate brother, though this is unlikely)

the ptolemaic dynasty of egypt was plagued by incest and treachery (yadda yadda) until it finally ended in 30 BC, when julius caesar decided egypt would make a nice backyard extension.

The part of an animal's spine that has transcended its natural limitations to set up an independent existence in a world of its own. Excepting in its fœtal state, Man is without a tail, a privation of which he attests an hereditary and uneasy consciousness by the coat-skirt of the male and the train of the female, and by a marked tendency to ornament that part of his attire where the tail should be, and indubitably once was. This tendency is most observable in the female of the species, in whom the ancestral sense is strong and persistent. The tailed men described by Lord Monboddo are now generally regarded as a product of an imagination unusually susceptible to influences generated in the golden age of our pithecan past.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

An ox wearing the popular religious yoke.