No better.

Outdoor eating event and memory challenge. You always forget something.

(also: picnic checklist)

(noun):
A charming little surprise that life throws at you when you least expect it, like a mischievous imp hiding in the shadows. It's a tiny annoyance that grows into an epic saga, making simple tasks feel like climbing Mount Everest with a rubber chicken.



(also: rubber chicken)

(n.) an intense windstorm which forms around a low pressure front over warm tropical water.

generally sent by divine providence to shake florida up every once in a while, when things have gotten too sane

A mineral that gives off heat and stimulates the organ that a scientist is a fool with.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(1832 – 1891) German engineer who developed compressed charge internal combustion engine to run on petrol
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: nikolaus august otto quotes)

a lucrative industry built on exploiting people's insecurities and desire for companionship. A fool's game where experts are often single and unhappy.

n. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Muhammad
Isaac Newton
Jesus of Nazareth
Buddha
Confucius
St. Paul
Ts'ai Lun
Johann Gutenberg
Christopher Columbus
Albert Einstein
Louis Pasteur
Galileo Galilei
Aristotle
Euclid
Moses
Charles Darwin
Shih Huang Ti
Augustus Caesar
Nicolaus Copernicus
Antoine Laurent Lavoisier
Constantine the Great
James Watt
Michael Faraday
James Clerk Maxwell
Martin Luther
George Washington
Karl Marx
Orville and Wilbur Wright
Genghis Kahn
Adam Smith
William Shakespeare
John Dalton
Alexander the Great
Napoleon Bonaparte
Thomas Edison
Antony van Leeuwenhoek
William T.G. Morton
Guglielmo Marconi
Adolf Hitler
Plato
Alexander Graham Bell
Alexander Fleming
John Locke
Ludwig van Beethoven
Werner Heisenberg
Louis Daguerre
Simon Bolivar
Rene Descartes
Michelangelo
Pope Urban II
Umar ibn al-Khattab
Asoka
St. Augustine
William Harvey
Ernest Rutherford
John Calvin
Gregor Mendel
Max Planck
Joseph Lister
Nikolaus August Otto
Francisco Pizarro
Hernando Cortes
Thomas Jefferson
Queen Isabella I
Joseph Stalin
Julius Caesar
William the Conqueror
Sigmund Freud
Edward Jenner
Wilhelm Conrad Roentgen
Johann Sebastian Bach
Lao Tzu
Voltaire
Johannes Kepler
Enrico Fermi
Leonhard Euler
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
niccolo machiavelli
Thomas Malthus
John F. Kennedy
Gregory Pincus
Mani
Lenin
Sui Wen Ti
Vasco da Gama
Cyrus the Great
Peter the Great
Mao Zedong
Francis Bacon
Henry Ford
Mencius
Zoroaster
Queen Elizabeth I
Mikhail Gorbachev
Menes
Charlemagne
Homer
Justinian I
Mahavira

both wonderful and depressing

A mundane way to pass time. You either love it, hate it or you don't care and do it for the money.

(also: boss)

person who takes unwanted things and makes them farther away.

the monarchy
the royal family of france (boo). spent their time blowing money on big castles and eating cake in a time of famine; understandably, many in france had decided they wanted them gone. in the grand game of revolution, they were more or less the ball being kicked around by other factions. but that's no reason to lose your head.

the sans-culottes
the masses of dispossessed and discontent in paris leading up to the revolution. their name is an indicator of how badly off they were, as it means they could not afford the fancier kinds of pants (which looked like crap and which nobody wears nowadays anyway). their popular movement was the irresistible tide which carried other factions into government as the final traces of the old rule were wiped away.

jacobins
a radical anti-monarchist political club which had numerous members in france's national assembly. when the blood had settled, the jacobins were the dominant force in france (this didn't last). famous jacobins included mirabeau and robespierre.

girondins
a faction that appealed to the provincial nobility outside of paris. they started as a somewhat more moderate wing of the jacobins until robespierre forced them out for being *too* moderate. one of the more famous girondins was charlotte corday, who liked killing people while they bathed.

cordeliers
among the most extreme factions in play during the revolution, calling for such radical reforms as universal suffrage and democracy. like the girondins, they lost significant power leading up to the revolution and the remaining members were declared public enemies by the jacobins after that. famous cordeliers include danton (a big ugly buff guy), marat (who liked getting killed by women while he was bathing), and hébert (one of those guys who died by ironic guillotine)

n. (Reporterese.) Milk.

(also: milk)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) A concept used by the rich to tell the poor to "pull themselves up by their bootstraps", and "I earned this private island/gold plated yacht/one hundred bedroom mansion!" The dress code is top hat and monocle.

(also: Economy)
(also: Socialism)

To weigh probabilities in the scales of desire.
(also: desire)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(also: Murica)
The most free place on Earth, Hell yeah. Be wary of Florida and it's inhabitants, they're a different breed.
(also: inhabitants of florida)
(also: freedom)

Cock and Ball torture, a sexual activity involving torture of the male's genitals

This can include: Wax Play, Genital Spanking, Squeezing, Ball Busting, Genital Flogging, Genital Flogging, Urethral Playing, Tickle Torture, Erotic electrostimulation, and Kicking.

the ancient chinese art of mystical housekeeping

a group of individuals who verbally, physically, mentally, and legally submit periods of service to the needs of their country. Historically, support and approval of military has highs and lows, globally. Historically, most needs of military members are not fully honored by the countries they submit service to.

(also: oath)
(also: vow)
(also: submit)