(n.) a craft intended to move across the top of a body of water. if it's really big it's called a ship. musical performer styx famously used one of these to saaaaaaaail away

The pig's reply to proponents of porcophagy.

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Moses Mendelssohn having fallen ill sent for a Christian physician, who at once diagnosed the philosopher's disorder as trichinosis, but tactfully gave it another name. "You need an immediate change of diet," he said; "you must eat six ounces of pork every other day."

"Pork?" shrieked the patient — "pork? Nothing shall induce me to touch it!"

"Do you mean that?" the doctor gravely asked.

"I swear it!"

"Good! — then I will undertake to cure you."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(v.) Conducting disputes over minor marginal issues, while overlooking more serious ones.
Derived from the scenario of people arguing over what color to paint the bicycle shed while the house is not finished.

(also: pedantry)
(also: law of triviality)
(also: peter's principle)

(also: grammar nazi)

(n.) that which helps establish a rhythm and a balance to poetry. feel the flow of your words and thoughts, don't force it. forced rhymes are like nails on a chalkboard, and no one wants that.
unsurprisingly, it is etymologically (thereby, historically and psychologically) connected both to mathematics, precision, reason, as well as to soul, flow, symmetry. a bridge between oft-warring factions (of science and spirituality).

earlier, also written as:
(also: rime)
(also: rhime)

(n.) 1) a word that censors will not allow you to say through a public medium. 2) supposedly a supernatural affliction that brings misfortune, often as punishment for wronging some supernatural entity. possibly what censors think they're protecting you from, though who knows.

Asian milk tea with black pearl like things that I choke on regulary (It is hard to write that seriously).

n. An arboreal animal which makes itself at home in genealogical trees

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Anarchy is a society being freely constituted without authorities or a governing body. It may also refer to a society or group of people that entirely rejects a set hierarchy. The word Anarchy was first used in English in 1539, meaning "an absence of government".

a system in which people are defined by points based on how they live life, and that it can affect their daily life, such as flying out of the country, decisions in court. a lot like the credit score for bank cards.

a region of northern europe consisting of sweden, denmark, and norway.

once the land of vikings, now primarily a source of weird european things

Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree

(also: everything)

There are a number of theories as to the ultimate cause which brought the universe into existence.

personally, i prefer to believe we were laid by an unimaginably vast chicken as a cosmic egg, and in honor of that, the egg is to be worshiped. will our souls ascend to a grand new state of being in the divine hatching, or will we be burned in the eternally frying pan of damnation?

(n.) 1) a trait which is inherited in a non-physical, non-genetic way, such as language. 2) the most insufferable goddam thing you can conceive of if it cloned itself, had sex with the clone and then ate the resulting babies for the +2 insufferability bonus.

(1743 – 1794) French chemist and biologist who had a leading impact on the chemical revolution.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: antoine laurent lavoisier quotes)

The offspring of a liaison between a bald head and a bank account.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

The point in the heavens directly overhead to a standing man or a growing cabbage. A man in bed or a cabbage in the pot is not considered as having a zenith, though from this view of the matter there was once a considerable dissent among the learned, some holding that the posture of the body was immaterial. These were called Horizontalists, their opponents, Verticalists. The Horizontalist heresy was finally extinguished by Xanobus, the philosopher-king of Abara, a zealous Verticalist. Entering an assembly of philosophers who were debating the matter, he cast a severed human head at the feet of his opponents and asked them to determine its zenith, explaining that its body was hanging by the heels outside. Observing that it was the head of their leader, the Horizontalists hastened to profess themselves converted to whatever opinion the Crown might be pleased to hold, and Horizontalism took its place among fides defuncti.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a state of emotional distress experienced while ashamed of emotion, preferring the aesthetic of stone-hearted rationality and objectivity.

n. Dr. Bartlett, of the Bulletin.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

the minutia in a debate that is what it is you're arguing about

(1723-1790) Scottish social philosopher and pioneer of classical economics.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: adam smith quotes)