confessions

trustycoffeemug

- author -

  1. total entries 618
  2. follower 4
  3. score 42120

scoop

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a dipping device too big to be a spoon (to show you mean business) and too small to be a shovel (to show you're not insecure)

(v.) scooping things with a scooping motion often by using a scoop

censor

trustycoffeemug
(n.) one who ensures that entertainment does not become too spicy for the mental digestion of the audience

(v.) to do what a censor does, much as an engineer engineers, or a doctor doctors. no, wait.

curse

trustycoffeemug
(n.) 1) a word that censors will not allow you to say through a public medium. 2) supposedly a supernatural affliction that brings misfortune, often as punishment for wronging some supernatural entity. possibly what censors think they're protecting you from, though who knows.

order and chaos

trustycoffeemug
according to some philosophies, the two forces that compete eternally for the privilege of predominating across the cosmos are best described as order and chaos

as barbarian tribes and pirate republics have struggled against imperialistic superpowers throughout history, and as the gods of civilization and culture have fought against dragons and giants and the primordial forces of raw nature in mythology, so too in the world of physics does the universe seem to vacillate between the orderly movement of the vast cosmos universe predicted by general relativity, and the chaotic and unpredictable mechanics of the infinitesimal quantum world.

in the grand scheme of things our paltry views of right and wrong are both meaningless and absurd

have you seen our entry on cheese?

unity

trustycoffeemug
Every German who chugs a beer! Every Zulu with an assegai spear!
Every Chinaman in a junk! Every Mexican in a trunk!
Every Bedouin on a dune! Every Frenchman playing Claire de Lune!
Every Syrian and Kazakhstani! Every Giorgio and his Armani!
Every Spaniard playing second flute! Every Dane, Norwegian and Aleut!
Every single guy who's Aborigine! Every Englishman who's Walter Pidgeon-y
From Hollywood, home of big celebrities- to Vanuatu in the Outer Hebrides!
From New Yorkers eatin' steak tartare! To every friend of Pablo Escobar!
From the Taiwanese and Cuban Petes, to the Russians with their soup of beets
Every Tamil, Tatar, Thai, Tibetan; everybody else that we're forgettin'
Everyone from Niger, Tonga, Bali; the French Sudan which is now called Mali
Everybody up in Katmandu! Every Canadian, cuz we're there too
Every Tajikistani with a yak! Every Bolivian in a sack!
Every caner in Singapore! Everybody who's really sore!
Every Turk in a Teaneck diner, or South African diamond miner
Every gypsy playin' finger cymbals! Everyone who ever shopped at Gimble's
We are there.

unity

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the great and noble thing we must all strive for, which we lack only because we're bogged down by petty arguments

except for when healthy disagreement is a good thing and we would see that if we weren't so bogged down by lack of ideological diversity

so basically everything is completely wrong either way. see order and chaos

edgy

trustycoffeemug
(adj.)

1) nervous, jumpy; more jittery than a green snake in a sugarcane plantation

2) avant-garde and trendmaking; for some reason, this usually equates to taking a corny cartoon made for immature children and retooling it into a grim cartoon for immature teenagers

indicia

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a way of saying "distinguishing characteristics," when you feel that just saying "distinguishing characteristics" just wouldn't cut it

"hey, this has all the indicia of a run on the banks, george!"

14 /

sign-up or face the consequences!


“"observers" must obey the call.”
join

sign up