confessions

trustycoffeemug

- author -

  1. total entries 606
  2. follower 4
  3. score 41567

mountain

trustycoffeemug
a very big and pointy rock that thrusts upwards from the surface of the earth, as though a magnificent pimple or blackhead on our planet's glorious face. i guess the sinkholes are sweat glands, or something. but never mind.

the climbing of a mountain is sometimes considered a form of recreation, evidently because it's there

etymology of clowns

trustycoffeemug
the word clown is believed to come from the low german cloyne, which refers to a boorish person of unrefined manners; it is possible, although less likely, that this may derive even further from the latin term colonus, meaning one who is a colonist (implicitly a rural and provincial type).

such biting contempt for the intelligence of the lower classes is surprisingly common in the english language; the word "boor" probably derives from the same source as the dutch "boer" (farmer), the term "villain" similarly may derive from a term for a rural laborer (i.e., one who worked the fields on a villa), and so on. even in modern england, the term "common," as in "commoner," can be seen as a mild insult casting aspersions on one's taste.

that's really it. sorry, i made this page by accident. mixed up the terms etymology and taxonomy. interesting, tho.

lynx

trustycoffeemug
a variety of large feline, with subvarieties dwelling in eurasia, iberia and north america, identifiable by the long wispy ears and pointy beard, giving its countenance sort of a "wise old man" mien

not to be confused with the links that lead to other pages on this site, or the ones on a golf course

fries

trustycoffeemug
(n.) elongated fragments of potato that have had the nutritional value fried and salted out of them. a highly accessible food sold in many venues as a side dish

playfully referred to as "french fries," though our best intelligence suggests they may have come from belgium instead (they may also be called "freedom fries" if the french are going through a period of significant unpopularity)

graverobbing

trustycoffeemug
one of the less savory human avocations, the act of graverobbing amounts to theft of a corpse or its sundry accoutrements from their proper place of internment.

graverobbing has been an epidemic concern at various points in history. for example, in egypt, even in ancient times (when it was better known as ancient egypt), the elaborate tombs of pharaohs were tempting targets for taphological treasure-hunting transgressors, who would seek to pillage not only the gold ornaments with which pharaohs were buried, but also occasionally the mummies themselves (apparently they were considered to have medicinal purposes. mmm, human jerky)

graverobbing was also a source of concern in victorian england, as the need for fresh corpses for medical research (and lack of willing donors) left doctors' associations with little other recourse but to accept stolen cadavers, maintaining plausible deniability by not asking too many questions.

graverobbing may strike the reader as callous, heartless, and reprehensible, but the open-minded among us should remember, you can't take it with you

friend

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a person one knows and in whose company they may pass pleasurable time. one who is not too zealous in their quest for repayment of borrowed money

the knowledge of friendship can be a source of comfort when the road looks rough ahead and one is miles and miles from their nice warm bed

oceania

trustycoffeemug
(n.) planet earth's seventh continent, as long as one decides to list it seventh while counting, and which is not a continent, technically speaking (it's just australia, which *is* a continent, and all the other places in the pacific that don't belong to any others)

in addition to australia, oceania is usually considered to include
* micronesia (including kiribati, resting comfortably right on the international date line)
* melanesia (including papua new guinea and, like... I guess some places they might have used for filming in "survivor." anyone remember that show?)
* and polynesia (including new zealand, hawaii, samoa, and the delightful statue heads at easter island)

colugo

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a gliding lemur-creature hailing from southeast asia, presumably having emigrated there from some sort of other planet inhabited by nightmares

despite the implication of the name, it is not a hybrid of the colubra and the galago

chichen itza

trustycoffeemug
a historical temple complex tucked into the jungles of the yucatan in mexico, one of the more famous remnants of mayan culture.

chichen itza's central jewel is a pyramid called el castillo, the castle, itself known for the astonishingly painstaking detail used by its architects, who imbued the structure's design with veritable assloads of mathematical significance. the entire complex is almost perfectly arranged so the west-facing staircase of el castillo lines up with the equator, the temple of the warriors with the tropic of cancer, and the thousand columns with the tropic of capricorn, with the sunrise aligning with each on the appropriate equinoxes and solstices. the north-facing staircase of el castillo is decorated with a snaky motif that points in the direction of a sacred cenote, or underground sinkhole-lake.

it also makes funny noises when you clap near it. sort of a tennis ball noise. go on, try it.

beware of mayan stall vendors, they are at their most obdurate in chichen itza and may mob you in a desperate bid to sell you a bird call.

kiwi

trustycoffeemug
(n.) an ovular blob fruit, consisting of a scrubby fuzzy skin encasing a ball of green flesh with more seeds than a tommy gun magazine has bullets.

(n.) a flightless bird with scrubby fuzzy plumage

(n.) one hailing from new zealand, a scrubby fuzzy country that floats about near australia

all in all a very versatile word

banana

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a fruit hailing from southeast asia and oceania, known for its beguilingly-elongated, whimsically-curved shape, and the ease with which its rind can be removed. actually neither of those qualities exists within natural, grown-in-the-wild bananas; both were engineered into the fruit by godless human meddling.

common cartoon knowledge holds the banana to be a favorite repast of the monkey.

cold

trustycoffeemug
(adj.) the condition of low temperature, pertaining variously to the weather, to food, to a sensation experienced when one touches a physical surface, to the cruel behavior of my heartless ex-wife, and various other referents

weathervane

trustycoffeemug
(n.) that wire chicken you sometimes see perched on top of buildings, pointing in the direction of the wind.

also called a weathercock. under no circumstances should you compress both of these words together to create a vaneycock.
7 /

sign-up or face the consequences!


“"observers" must obey the call.”
join

sign up