n. A shrine in which is worshiped "the image of its pa." The word is from the French berceaunette, but the "image" is derived Lord knows whence.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
, n. The cockatrice. A sort of serpent hatched from the egg of a cock. The basilisk had a bad eye, and its glance was fatal. Many infidels deny this creature's existence, but Semprello Aurator saw and handled one that had been blinded by lightning as a punishment for having fatally gazed on a lady of rank whom Jupiter loved. Juno afterward restored the reptile's sight and hid it in a cave. Nothing is so well attested by the ancients as the existence of the basilisk, but the cocks have stopped laying
(also: The Devil's Dictionary).
(also: The Devil's Dictionary).
n. One of the ten thousand varieties of the genus Lawyer. In England the functions of a barrister are distinct from those of a solicitor. The one advises, the other executes; but the thing advised and the thing executed is the client.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. A house in which soldiers enjoy a portion of that of which it is their business to deprive others.
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n. An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
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n. The song of the dog.
"My bark is on the wave," all writers quote.
"Mine too," says the retriever, "is afloat."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
"My bark is on the wave," all writers quote.
"Mine too," says the retriever, "is afloat."
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n. A person who makes rhymes. The word is one of the numerous aliases under which the poet seeks to veil his identity and escape opprobrium.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. (Lat. barbarus, savage, from barba, the beard.) A savage whose laceration of your cheek is unobserved in the superior torment of his conversation.
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n. A sacred rite of such efficacy that he who finds himself in heaven without having undergone it will be unhappy forever. It is performed with water in two ways—by immersion, or plunging, and by aspersion, or sprinkling.
But whether the plan of immersion
Is better than simple aspersion
Let those immersed
And those aspersed
Decide by the Authorized Version,
And by matching their agues tertian.
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
But whether the plan of immersion
Is better than simple aspersion
Let those immersed
And those aspersed
Decide by the Authorized Version,
And by matching their agues tertian.
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
v.t. To admonish, protest or persuade, with a club.
Tom having taken Jane to be his wife,
His friends expect of him a better life;
For still by her example he is led,
And when she bangs her hair he bangs her head.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Tom having taken Jane to be his wife,
His friends expect of him a better life;
For still by her example he is led,
And when she bangs her hair he bangs her head.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. The cry of a gun. That arrangement of a woman's hair which suggests the thought of shooting her; hence the name.
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n. A person who takes by force from A what A has taken by guile from B.
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n. A simple device by which a majority proves to a minority the folly of resistance. Many worthy persons of imperfect thinking apparatus believe that majorities govern through some inherent right; and minorities submit, not because they must, but because they ought.
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adj. Destitute of hair from hereditary or accidental causes—never from.
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n. A preparation that renders the hook more palatable. The best kind is beauty.
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n. The mummy of a pig embalmed in brine. To "save one's bacon" is to narrowly escape some particular woman, or other peril.
By heaven forsaken,
By Justice o'ertaken,
He saved his bacon
By cutting a single slice of it;
For 'twas cut from the throat,
And we venture to quote
Death, hell and the grave as the price of it.
—S. F. Journal of Commerce
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
By heaven forsaken,
By Justice o'ertaken,
He saved his bacon
By cutting a single slice of it;
For 'twas cut from the throat,
And we venture to quote
Death, hell and the grave as the price of it.
—S. F. Journal of Commerce
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
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