n. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. One of an ancient race who do not appear to have been much concerned about woman's rights and the equality of the sexes. Their thoughtless habit of twisting the necks of the males has unfortunately resulted in the extinction of their kind.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. A public nuisance who mistakes taste for skill, and confounds his ambition with his ability.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. The place whereon the priest formerly raveled out the small intestine of the sacrificial victim for purposes of divination and cooked its flesh for the gods. The word is now seldom used, except with reference to the sacrifice of their liberty and peace by a male and a female fool.
They stood before the altar and supplied
The fire themselves in which their fat was fried.
In vain the sacrifice!—no god will claim
An offering burnt with an unholy flame.
—M.P. Nopput
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
They stood before the altar and supplied
The fire themselves in which their fat was fried.
In vain the sacrifice!—no god will claim
An offering burnt with an unholy flame.
—M.P. Nopput
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
adj. In bad company.
In contact, lo! the flint and steel,
By spark and flame, the thought reveal
That he the metal, she the stone,
Had cherished secretly alone.
—Booley Fito
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
In contact, lo! the flint and steel,
By spark and flame, the thought reveal
That he the metal, she the stone,
Had cherished secretly alone.
—Booley Fito
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World. Herodotus says the Indus is, with one exception, the only river that produces crocodiles, but they appear to have gone West and grown up with the other rivers. From the notches on his back the alligator is called a sawrian.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pocket that they cannot separately plunder a third.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n.
This thing Allegiance, as I suppose,
Is a ring fitted in the subject's nose,
Whereby that organ is kept rightly pointed
To smell the sweetness of the Lord's anointed.
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
This thing Allegiance, as I suppose,
Is a ring fitted in the subject's nose,
Whereby that organ is kept rightly pointed
To smell the sweetness of the Lord's anointed.
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
. The Mahometan Supreme Being, as distinguished from the Christian, Jewish, and so forth.
Allah's good laws I faithfully have kept,
And ever for the sins of man have wept;
And sometimes kneeling in the temple I
Have reverently crossed my hands and slept.
—Junker Barlow
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Allah's good laws I faithfully have kept,
And ever for the sins of man have wept;
And sometimes kneeling in the temple I
Have reverently crossed my hands and slept.
—Junker Barlow
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. An ingenious criminal who covers his secret thieving with a pretence of open marauding.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. (Arabic al kohl, a paint for the eyes.) The essential principle of all.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. An instrument of torture in which one's lady friends crucify him between two thieves.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. The task we set our wishes to.
"Cheer up! Have you no aim in life?"
She tenderly inquired.
"An aim? Well, no, I haven't, wife;
The fact is—I have fired."
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
"Cheer up! Have you no aim in life?"
She tenderly inquired.
"An aim? Well, no, I haven't, wife;
The fact is—I have fired."
—G.J.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. A politician who carries his real estate under his nails. A son of the soil who, like Æneas, carries his father on his person.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
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