confessions

trustycoffeemug

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  1. total entries 621
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meme

trustycoffeemug
(n.) 1) a trait which is inherited in a non-physical, non-genetic way, such as language. 2) the most insufferable goddam thing you can conceive of if it cloned itself, had sex with the clone and then ate the resulting babies for the +2 insufferability bonus.

courage

trustycoffeemug
(n.) bravery; ability to act in the face of fear, pain or grief

among other things this quality is believed to make a king of a slave, induce the flag on the mast to wave, and put the 'ape' in 'apricot'

indira gandhi

trustycoffeemug
(1971-1984)

the second most famous indian person named gandhi to be assassinated. india's first female prime minister, famous for getting the country mixed up in a war with pakistan and for testing huge-ass nuclear weapons in the indian desert. one suspects she was in margaret thatcher's book club

eventually killed by her own sikh bodyguards in 1984, which got the rest of india very upset with the sikhs. and so the wheel of human intrigue turns onward.

archenemy

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the foremost of one's enemies, opponents, or adversaries. an archenemy can define one's character as much as a friend or ally can, and in a sense, having one is therefore a necessary step to self-actualization.

famous archenemies include:
united states and soviet union
britain and france
sherlock holmes and professor moriarty
batman and joker
humanity and nature
louis pasteur and antoine béchamp
elvis and robert goulet

and so on

soviet union

trustycoffeemug
a partnership between russia and a number of other eastern european states that existed between 1922 and 1991. this union formed one of the major blocs in world politics at that time, along with the nato bloc consisting of the united states and its buddies, and the third bloc that didn't give a damn.

the soviet union and the nato bloc were in a state of cold war for decades following world war ii, which was such a bonding experience that everyone felt a little let down when it finally ended. as a memory of those happier times, america and russia continue to occasionally dick with each other.

assassination

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the art of killing important people so as to prevent them from doing important things. assassinations are events of massive historical significance and have caused such tragedies as wars, revolutions, and walter cronkite tearing up during a public news broadcast.

elvis

trustycoffeemug
a singer (to be precise, both a wailer and a crooner) who enjoyed enormous popularity between the nineteen-fifties and nineteen-seventies, culminating with his going to seed and an ignominious death on the toilet

known for his distinctive voice and sense of style, he has been called the king of rock and roll. although he had a surname (presley), it is rarely necessary to use it, as he is the most famous bearer of the name 'elvis' in history.

these facts, taken into consideration with the hordes of those who seek to impersonate him at las vegas and who insist they have seen him alive and well long after his death, suggest that he is roughly on par with jesus of nazareth in his religious significance

karl marx

trustycoffeemug
(1818-1883): an unruly german whose writings on political economy and good labor relations formed the basis for our modern understanding of communism.

debates will be ongoing on whether he would have approved of any of his fans from russia

thanksgiving

trustycoffeemug
an autumnal holiday celebrated in the americas (both the united states and canada, though on different days) to commemorate any of the following:

1) the historical colonization of the americas (possibly including the displacement of the indigenous people)
2) overeating
3) enduring the presence of family
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