confessions

trustycoffeemug

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  1. total entries 616
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honor

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a quality of esteem conferred upon individuals by their community, usually to mark bravery and a sense of fair play

cultural constructs such as these probably evolved as a way of ensuring our nobler instincts can occasionally override our deep-seated desire to be self-preserving dicks

dolphin

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the grinning killer of the ocean depths, a squeaking sexual predator, a maritime molester, a blowholed bastard, a swirling nest of aquatic evil

considered one of nature's surprisingly intelligent animals

noodles

trustycoffeemug
(n.) dough that's been shaped into long strands. a most versatile form of food.

supposedly invented by the chinese and then introduced to italians by marco polo. this supposition is untrue, but everyone will still say it anyway so you might as well

(also: pasta)

pizza

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a flatbread smeared with crushed tomato and cheeses, topped with the spicier forms of meat and perhaps more exotic toppings. widely enjoyed as a form of food which the eater does not have to make themselves

was invented by italians, probably as a form of atonement for either opera or mussolini

chimpanzee

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the nearest relative to humanity in the animal kingdom, sharing our boundless savagery but generally looking cuter in tiny clothes or while riding a unicycle

not to be confused with bonobos, assuming one wishes to keep their face glued onto their skull
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