(n.) you'd think this would be some sort of combination caravan and a carousel, but lamentably the term simply refers to a kind of boat.

(v.) a revolt against the authority of upper case and all formal, social-signalling tomfoolery.

(also: upper case)

(n.) the haunting knowledge that one has done something wrong despite their better judgment; generally a deterrent against future wrongdoing until the individual forgets about it

(also: shame)

Earth 1.0

The major problem - one of the major problems, for there are several - one of the many major problems with governing people is that of whom you get to do it; or rather of who manages to get people to let them do it to them.
To summarize: it is a well known fact, that those people who most want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it.
To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.

(also: people)
(also: problem)

a monster who does not belong in this world, who steals men's souls and makes them his slaves. mankind ill needs a savior such as him

... you see what i did there? huh? huh?

“Where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure.”
― Rumi
(also: rumi)

(n.) stating that people in a hierarchy tend to rise to their "level of incompetence".
employees are promoted based on their success in previous jobs until they reach a position where they are no longer competent.

(also: incompetence)

A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics. The following illustrative lines were written of a Californian gentleman in high political preferment, who has passed to his accounting:

---

Of such tenacity his grip
That nothing from his hand can slip.
Well-buttered eels you may o'erwhelm
In tubs of liquid slippery-elm
In vain — from his detaining pinch
They cannot struggle half an inch!
'Tis lucky that he so is planned
That breath he draws not with his hand,
For if he did, so great his greed
He'd draw his last with eager speed.
Nay, that were well, you say. Not so
He'd draw but never let it go!
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

someone who enjoys gobbling down fine food

the twentieth letter of the English alphabet, was by the Greeks absurdly called tau. In the alphabet whence ours comes it had the form of the rude corkscrew of the period, and when it stood alone (which was more than the Phœnicians could always do) signified Tallegal, translated by the learned Dr. Brownrigg, "tanglefoot."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A senseless thing that holds food without eating it.

---

She uttered her mind, without ceasing:
And this is the thought that it carried.
"I fear that your love is decreasing.
How is it, dear, now that we're married?"

Replied that aciduous sinner,
Fatigued of her reasonless chatter:
"When a fellow has eaten his dinner
He doesn't make love to the platter"
—Belijah H. Bimbee
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) one afflicted by madness or frenzy; one who dances like they've never danced before

outré, i.e. violently bigoted

(n.) an attempt to do oneself in through the most pleasant means at hand, including drunkenness, gluttony, and general revelry

(also: debauchery)
(also: hedonism)
(also: New Orleans)

also "sci-fi" (skiffy) if you're afraid of using too many syllables.

a genre of fiction, consisting of stories that, broadly speaking, dare to imagine new inventions, technologies, or scientific discoveries, and how they would affect the world. often this will consist of showing us how humanity would use these new discoveries to destroy itself or oppress each other; there are startlingly few stories where police using psychics to stop crime, or society having a robot taskforce, or people upgrading themselves with cyborg limbs, actually turns out to be a *good* thing (though this may just be because stories where only good things happen are boring).

some concepts you should know about so you won't look like a dweeb in front of sci-fi fans:
* the future, where a lot of these stories tend to take place
* aliens, folks who come from off this island earth. show up in a lot of sci-fi stories, usually invading us, getting invaded by us, or just sort of hanging around bars as a way for the special effects team to show off.
* robot, artificially constructed people, because naturally you'd want your smartphone to look like a person
* ftl: faster-than-light travel, required in any sci-fi story with space travel, or else it would take millennia to finish
* time travel: being able to leave today and go to yesterday, or tomorrow. prone to logical paradoxes.
* hard science fiction: sci-fi that tries to be as realistic as possible. is not a form of pornography
* space opera: stories where people fly around in spaceships and have fantastic adventures on other planets
* cyberpunk and other punk; stories that show how technological process won't fix society's usual problems

(1694 – 1778). A key figure of European Enlightenment. His satirical writings played a role in the French Revolution
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: voltaire quotes)

(n.) the most direct breed of tyrant, maintaining their brand of tyranny by the sinister means of owning the place you live in

A body of elderly gentlemen charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
(also: gentlewomen)

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

to sing some medieval Hebrew poetry that you've half-memorized out of a book along with all the other congregants. If you want to seek a true connection to God beyond mere recitation, the translation can be found on the opposite-facing page.