n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The sentiments and emotions which every literary anatomist now knows to haunt the heart were anciently believed to infest the liver; and even Gascoygne, speaking of the emotional side of human nature, calls it "our hepaticall parte." It was at one time considered the seat of life; hence its name — liver, the thing we live with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg paté.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) apparently one of the creator's attempts at the ultimate life form. commonly found in maryland

The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly (Musca maledicta). The father of Zoölogy was Aristotle, as is universally conceded, but the name of its mother has not come down to us. Two of the science's most illustrious expounders were Buffon and Oliver Goldsmith, from both of whom we learn (L'Histoire générale des animaux and A History of Animated Nature) that the domestic cow sheds its horns every two years.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

A species of tree having several varieties, of which the familiar "itching palm" (Palma hominis) is most widely distributed and sedulously cultivated. This noble vegetable exudes a kind of invisible gum, which may be detected by applying to the bark a piece of gold or silver. The metal will adhere with remarkable tenacity. The fruit of the itching palm is so bitter and unsatisfying that a considerable percentage of it is sometimes given away in what are known as "benefactions."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

The known part of the route from an arboreal ancestor with a swim bladder to an urban descendant with a cigarette.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a craft intended to move across the top of a body of water. if it's really big it's called a ship. musical performer styx famously used one of these to saaaaaaaail away

A mechanical device for inflicting personal distinction — prototype of the modern newspaper conducted by persons of austere virtues and blameless lives.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(adj.) that which has the audacity to be other and different

(n.) a hypothetical creature that is extraterrestrial in nature, which is to say, very audaciously other and different. as with ghosts, bigfoot, fairies, and god, one of those things that is not confirmed to actually exist but many people insist they've seen

grown-up word for umbrella step

n. A gift from one who is legging it out of this vale of tears.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) um... ask your mother.

n. A person more learned in the languages of others than wise in his own.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

that which occurs when the other shoe finally drops, and that shoe sets off an elaborate rube goldberg device that culminates with your balls being snapped in a mousetrap hold-down bar. so to speak.
(also: consequence)

darkness happening in daylight

(also: tragedy)

All men are assured the first death, which is otherwise known as sleep, and then judgement. The second death is when The Lord no longer thinks of you and casts you into the fiery hell.

form of restaurant where they throw hot food at you

The greased pig in the field game of American politics.

v.t. To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

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As sovereigns are anointed by the priesthood,
So pigs to lead the populace are greased good.
—Judibras

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(1832 – 1891) German engineer who developed compressed charge internal combustion engine to run on petrol
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: nikolaus august otto quotes)

A mini (Short for miniature) is a, you guessed it, miniature model of something.
Many companies, like GamesWorkshop, sell these toys for games, such as Warhammer or DnD. Alternatively they might be just display pieces, like ships in bottles.
They might require assembly and even painting.

(also: Warhammer)
(also: DnD)
(also: Nerd)