mathematical function defined as the value obtained when 'tan(x)' is put into a calculator

(noun): A game of numbers in which the winner is the one who accumulates the most imaginary points, while convincing others that these points actually have value.

(also: business world)

n. A kind of inlaid work. From Moses, who when little was inlaid in a basket among the bulrush.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) a professional who studies the health and condition of teeth, regarded as kin to schoolteachers and other torturers

when someone cancels plans you've made together and you realize you now have some free time to yourself.

(also: introvert)

(c 563 – 483 BC) Spiritual Teacher and founder of Buddhism.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: buddha quotes)

The urge to slap, hit, punch, kill, or otherwise physically harm your sibling.
Named after Cain who, in biblical canon, commited the first murder by hitting his brother on the head with a rock.
(also: fratricide)
(also: bible)

a two-week-long suicide threat

Archaic practices designed to rob scalps and backs of the most pleasurable sensation the nerve endings within can experience.

a supposed king of england who supposedly ruled around the time the roman empire had withdrawn from the country in the late fifth century. supposedly.

known for being conceived by 'magical' rape-by-fraud, hanging out with wizards, pulling a sword out of a big rock, conquering a number of european places, being cuckolded by a frenchman, trying to drown hundreds of children, and finally getting killed by the one child he didn't manage to drown

although he probably did not actually exist, he is much better known than a majority of real english historical figures

Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first.
(also: patriot)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Appointing your party to various offices for the good of your grandmother

The phenomenon by which the value of currency goes down, as if it were being simultaneously attacked by the common cold and a horde of ferocious wildebeests. A process that makes your money worth less and less, until eventually it's worth about as much as the promise of a pension from a galactic government."

sex-neutral version of penis

real name of united states of america according to my ass
(also: america)

n. The period of a thousand years when the lid is to be screwed down, with all reformers on the under side.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) european country; country you call when you need a replacement germany. famous for old classical musicians or something

(n.) one who exists to prevent things from happening, on the off-chance those things might be dangerous.

a surgical examination of your own body to determine how you died

(noun):
A mythological figure in spandex, armed with superpowers and a wardrobe that defies practicality. They battle villains, save the day, and occasionally face existential crises about their secret identities.

(also: superhero)
(also: american art of saving the day)