A creature thoughtfully created to supply occasion for the following lines by the illustrious Ambat Delaso:
TO MY PET TORTOISE
My friend, you are not graceful — not at all;
Your gait's between a stagger and a sprawl.
Nor are you beautiful: your head's a snake's
To look at, and I do not doubt it aches.
As to your feet, they'd make an angel weep.
'Tis true you take them in whene'er you sleep.
No, you're not pretty, but you have, I own,
A certain firmness — mostly you're backbone.
Firmness and strength (you have a giant's thews)
Are virtues that the great know how to use —
I wish that they did not; yet, on the whole,
You lack — excuse my mentioning it — Soul.
So, to be candid, unreserved and true,
I'd rather you were I than I were you.
Perhaps, however, in a time to be,
When Man's extinct, a better world may see
Your progeny in power and control,
Due to the genesis and growth of Soul.
So I salute you as a reptile grand
Predestined to regenerate the land.
Father of Possibilities, O deign
To accept the homage of a dying reign!
In the far region of the unforeknown
I dream a tortoise upon every throne.
I see an Emperor his head withdraw
Into his carapace for fear of Law;
A King who carries something else than fat,
Howe'er acceptably he carries that;
A President not strenuously bent
On punishment of audible dissent —
Who never shot (it were a vain attack)
An armed or unarmed tortoise in the back;
Subjects and citizens that feel no need
To make the March of Mind a wild stampede;
All progress slow, contemplative, sedate,
And "Take your time" the word, in Church and State.
O Tortoise, 'tis a happy, happy dream,
My glorious testudinous régime!
I wish in Eden you'd brought this about
By slouching in and chasing Adam out.
(also: god)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(n.) more often than not, a blessing in disguise. a call to refocus on what your body really needs for health. a reframing of values and priorities.
(also: pain)
(also: priorities)
(also: pain)
(also: priorities)
(n.) a deep story, which, when measured against literal-mindedness, seems a lie (hence the popular use of the term 'myth' to indicate a falsehood). a story children will ask to hear again and again, not because they are stupid or have low standards, but because they are absorbing cultural and existential patterns.
hear my vow,
I reclaim this term 'myth',
here and now!
(also: vow)
(also: oath)
(also: stake-claiming flag)
(also: flag on the moon)
hear my vow,
I reclaim this term 'myth',
here and now!
(also: vow)
(also: oath)
(also: stake-claiming flag)
(also: flag on the moon)
(1870 – 1924) Leader of the Russian Revolution and new Communist regime from 1917 to 1924.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: lenin quotes)
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: lenin quotes)
(noun phrase) A metaphorical beacon that embodies the selfless dedication of teachers, illuminating the path of knowledge for generations. Yet, tragically, this luminary role often remains underappreciated and underpaid.
(also: teaching)
(also: teaching)
(noun): A game of numbers in which the winner is the one who accumulates the most imaginary points, while convincing others that these points actually have value.
(also: business world)
(also: business world)
(584 CE – 644 CE) Powerful Muslim Caliphate and senior companion of Muhammad. An influential figure in Sunni Islam.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: umar ibn al-khattab quotes)
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: umar ibn al-khattab quotes)
One of the few characters of the Grecian mythology accorded recognition in the Hebrew. (Leviticus, xvii, 7.) The satyr was at first a member of the dissolute community acknowledging a loose allegiance to Dionysus, but underwent many transformations and improvements. Not infrequently he is confounded with the faun, a later and decenter creation of the Romans, who was less like a man and more like a goat.
(also: mythology)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: mythology)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
the place people are talking about when they say america, other american places apparently not counting
someone who is nervous and irritatable
A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics. The following illustrative lines were written of a Californian gentleman in high political preferment, who has passed to his accounting:
Of such tenacity his grip
That nothing from his hand can slip.
Well-buttered eels you may o'erwhelm
In tubs of liquid slippery-elm
In vain — from his detaining pinch
They cannot struggle half an inch!
'Tis lucky that he so is planned
That breath he draws not with his hand,
For if he did, so great his greed
He'd draw his last with eager speed.
Nay, that were well, you say. Not so
He'd draw but never let it go!
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Of such tenacity his grip
That nothing from his hand can slip.
Well-buttered eels you may o'erwhelm
In tubs of liquid slippery-elm
In vain — from his detaining pinch
They cannot struggle half an inch!
'Tis lucky that he so is planned
That breath he draws not with his hand,
For if he did, so great his greed
He'd draw his last with eager speed.
Nay, that were well, you say. Not so
He'd draw but never let it go!
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
an elderly person who does not treat their juniors with deference.
(n.) one who tracks down and apprehends people for money, usually criminals who have jumped bail.
somewhat similar to a private detective but less likely to wear a monochrome trench coat or monologue to oneself in the rain
somewhat similar to a private detective but less likely to wear a monochrome trench coat or monologue to oneself in the rain
(n.) a lifestyle of comfort and enjoyment, justifiable only through abstruse philosophical ramblings
(also: bacchanalia)
(also: food)
(also: drugs)
(also: sex)
(also: alcohol)
(also: bacchanalia)
(also: food)
(also: drugs)
(also: sex)
(also: alcohol)
(n.) one who collects evidence in order to ensure someone is punished for the committing of a crime, preferably the person who actually committed it
(adj.) a symbolic way to represent the many functions and capabilities of an entity, especially the infinite nature of the divine.
(also: gods and goddesses)
(also: kitsune)
(also: be not afraid)
(also: gods and goddesses)
(also: kitsune)
(also: be not afraid)
Apparently.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
n. One who throws light upon a subject; as an editor by not writing about it.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
sign-up or face the consequences!
“"observers" must obey the call.”
join