toothpick

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a small tree able to be held between two fingers, used to scrape leftovers from between your teeth or debris from other hard-to-reach spaces.

... usually it is considered a bad idea to do both with the same toothpick.

entropy

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a term used in physics that describes a condition of microstates not being organized into a coherent macrostate, or in other words a condition of disorder

the second thermodynamic law demands that the universe always gravitate towards more entropy; even the act of painstakingly bringing order a system increases entropy on the microscopic level.

The natural conclusion to these facts is that the universe will eventually reach heat death, in which no energy is left for the universe to continue going. here's hoping.

god's afk try later

boo
(n) A convenient excuse for the Almighty to shirk their divine duties and leave humanity to their own devices. One can only imagine the heavenly distractions that must be more important than answering prayers or intervening in earthly affairs. Perhaps God is binge-watching a new series on Netflix or indulging in a celestial spa day. Either way, mere mortals will have to wait until God returns to their desk to handle the backlog of requests. In the meantime, humans may have to resort to solving their own problems, like adults.

(also: creation of the universe)

newtonian

the devils dictionary
Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when.

table d'hote

the devils dictionary
A caterer's thrifty concession to the universal passion for irresponsibility.

Old Paunchinello, freshly wed,
Took Madam P. to table,
And there deliriously fed
As fast as he was able.

"I dote upon good grub," he cried,
Intent upon its throatage.
"Ah, yes," said the neglected bride,
"You're in your table d'hôtage."
—Associated Poets
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

frankenstein

trustycoffeemug
an 1881 novel written by mary shelley. arguably one of the earliest known works of science fiction and the origin point for one of fiction's greatest monsters, nobody has read it, because there's a more popular movie.

the plot concerns an obsessive doctor who believes he can synthesize his own life form, but upon doing so, he fails to raise it properly, leading to a very bad wedding, an expedition to the north pole, and many ponderous philosophical arguments.

differences from the source material: in the book, the monster was motivated by revenge outright, and was pretty chatty. since the 1931 movie, people have thought of frankenstein's monster as a voiceless, child-brained hulk who doesn't fully realize the consequences of his own actions.

to be absolutely clear, the monster is not named frankenstein. the monster is never given a name. but we can call him dave, if you like. in any case he is widely acknowledged as one of the all-time groovy ghoulies, like dracula and the wolf man

regret

frosty458
to desire a situation that didn't happen due, usually due to making a decision that was more logical or convenient or more beneficial (at that point-in-time)
example: i regret not going to community college and then transferring to university because i would've saved thousands of dollars and still would've graduated within four years anyway!

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