One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.)
narcotics? yes.
your prescription at the pharmacy? yes.
psychedelics? yes.
coffee? yes.

the associations, implications, and moral judgments behind 'drugs' varies widely. so instead of 'drugs', use the specific category you mean.

the most limited definition I've seen is, "a substance recognized or defined by the US Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act."
a drug is a drug because of the effects it has on a person when used, not because of a label slapped on it by some top-down council. this definition only works in its legal function. and yet, this narrow style of thinking about 'drugs' (for example, all drugs are bad; drug use is always drug abuse; see also, thinking such as https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2djwbhadeY) is pervasive beyond the legal system.

(also: medicine)
(also: harm reduction)
(also: addiction)

(also: immoral vs illegal)
(also: social norms)
(also: black and white thinking)

n. One of the most important organs of the female system — an admirable provision of nature for the repose of infancy, but chiefly useful in rural festivities to support plates of cold chicken and heads of adult males. The male of our species has a rudimentary lap, imperfectly developed and in no way contributing to the animal's substantial welfare.

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

(n.) the point at which a married couple simply can't make the holy and sacred bond of matrimony work anymore

(also: divorce rate)

A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics. The following illustrative lines were written of a Californian gentleman in high political preferment, who has passed to his accounting:

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Of such tenacity his grip
That nothing from his hand can slip.
Well-buttered eels you may o'erwhelm
In tubs of liquid slippery-elm
In vain — from his detaining pinch
They cannot struggle half an inch!
'Tis lucky that he so is planned
That breath he draws not with his hand,
For if he did, so great his greed
He'd draw his last with eager speed.
Nay, that were well, you say. Not so
He'd draw but never let it go!
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

an excuse for European countries to get (ahem, how to put this nicely..) creative.

well, you'd think just European countries. after all, it's in the name, right? --wrong.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_in_the_Eurovision_Song_Contest#Participants
(also: russia)
(also: israel)
(also: australia)
(also: turkey)

(also: pop music)
(also: geopolitics)
(also: block voting)

(btw here, 'my' means 'мы', ergo different pronunciation -- https://forvo.com/word/%D0%BC%D1%8B/)

(also: weirdness abounds)
(also: costume-heavy)
(also: twin-tastic)
(also: high notes)
(also: opera singers)
(also: cultural stereotypes)

and overthinking eurovision in all its glory:
2013: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSPtB2VoO0cpzg-VeHIsaZFB
2014: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSNvAwL8Gb6oKx2o68kTBRXR
2015: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSP_7Bd0rDLjNoLfpG-BuCTj
2016: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSNq04GQ_agpfBp7sV-V_Gog
2017: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSNFak9-d88kdTrfACAn7FqJ
2018: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7KDRg_scQSOxUEkWwIUp6q02p2IKzOX5

(n.) a quality of esteem conferred upon individuals by their community, usually to mark bravery and a sense of fair play

cultural constructs such as these probably evolved as a way of ensuring our nobler instincts can occasionally override our deep-seated desire to be self-preserving dicks

adj. Not understood.
(also: the devils dictionary)

A species of hypnotism in which the oral suggestion takes the hindering form of argument or appeal.
In the legislative body of the future, votes will be won, as now, by hypnotic suggestion, but there will be no darkening of counsel and impeding of the public business by debate; opposition will be stared into assent.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

v.t.
1. To correct an erring friend or admonish a needy one. Of women the word abandoned is used in the sense of indiscreet.
2. To confer the advantage of being rid of you. To recant

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Thank heaven, I have abandoned the follies of youth for those of age.
—Chauncey Depew


(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

v.t. To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

---

As sovereigns are anointed by the priesthood,
So pigs to lead the populace are greased good.
—Judibras

(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

a device used to convert electricity into a lack of productivity.

(n.) a lifestyle of comfort and enjoyment, justifiable only through abstruse philosophical ramblings

(also: bacchanalia)
(also: food)
(also: drugs)
(also: sex)
(also: alcohol)

(n.) a garment intended to be placed upon the head. convenient for conveying one's status and hiding any bald spots

story of a worldwide event present in many independent accounts around the world. The fact that it is evidenced in so many cultures shows that they all ripped each other off

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
― Albert Einstein
(also: Albert Einstein)

c. 3000 BC Egyptian pharaoh who united Upper and Lower Egypt to found the First Dynasty.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: menes quotes)

(n.) country that serves as the origin place of western society and democracy (at least, the original kind of western society and democracy, with less individual freedom and more gay sex).

Famed for the understated beauty of their marble statues (even though those statues were originally painted and look nothing like the artists originally intended)

(n.) a genre of frivolous entertainment intended to distract from mortality

one of the more pervasive postulates in the field of hooey.

in summarium, the idea that veins of vague, unquantifiable "energy" crisscross the planet, intersecting at points of equally vague significance, usually ones humans handily chose to mark with photogenic landmarks such as stonehenge

equivalent to "dragon paths" in chinese culture, to "songlines" in australian aboriginal culture, and (functionally) to aliens building the pyramids in sane person culture.