t

the devils dictionary
the twentieth letter of the English alphabet, was by the Greeks absurdly called tau. In the alphabet whence ours comes it had the form of the rude corkscrew of the period, and when it stood alone (which was more than the Phœnicians could always do) signified Tallegal, translated by the learned Dr. Brownrigg, "tanglefoot."
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

scotland

trustycoffeemug
britain's version of the deep south, located inconveniently in the north

known for its kilts, heather, bagpipes, fried things, beards, and jabbering. while england is represented by the lion, scotland is (less commonly) associated with the unicorn, and, like the unicorn, scotsmen look like a bunch of sissy girly skirt-wearers until they gore you in the stomach

election

trustycoffeemug
a means of selecting political leaders in which candidates perform for the amusement of the citizenry and attempt to suppress their objectionable characteristics, in exchange for which eligible citizens award them points in the form of little slips of paper with the candidates' names written on them. the points are then tallied to determine the winner and everyone goes home unhappy

elections are generally seen as mercifully less exciting than the previous system of violent uprisings and revolutions

inflation

kivi
(noun): The ultimate magic trick, where prices rise, and your money vanishes, and nobody knows where it went. The government and the wealthy know the secret, but they ain't telling. Inflation, the ultimate way to redistribute wealth, and make the poor, poorer and the rich, richer, all while making the masses believe it's just a natural occurrence.

censor

trustycoffeemug
(n.) one who ensures that entertainment does not become too spicy for the mental digestion of the audience

(v.) to do what a censor does, much as an engineer engineers, or a doctor doctors. no, wait.

sign-up or face the consequences!


“"observers" must obey the call.”
join

sign up