A human between the age of 0 and 12 is considered a child. These creatures are also known as: “Devil”, “Asspain” & “Brats”

to behave under the knowledge that you could be taken out by a drone strike ten seconds from now, so it's no use waiting for anything ever.

n. A gift from one who is legging it out of this vale of tears.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

One who holds the belief that a clergyman is a priest. Denial of this momentous doctrine is the hardiest challenge that is now flung into the teeth of the Episcopalian church by the Neo-Dictionarians.
(also: dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

exactly what it says on the tin.
not impossible, despite the popular belief and all those venn diagram memes about "choose 2 of 3"..
https://sive.rs/hsu

(also: omni-win)

A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.

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Sharp, irresistible by mail or shield,
By guard unparried as by flight unstayed,
O serviceable Rumor, let me wield
Against my enemy no other blade.
His be the terror of a foe unseen,
His the inutile hand upon the hilt,
And mine the deadly tongue, long, slender, keen,
Hinting a rumor of some ancient guilt.
So shall I slay the wretch without a blow,
Spare me to celebrate his overthrow,
And nurse my valor for another foe.
—Joel Buxter
(also: humor)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

archimedes of syracuse (287-212 BC) was perhaps the greatest mathematical mind of his day. a student of the mouseion of alexandria, archimedes returned to his home city of syracuse to become an inventor of great renown.

he is reputed to be the originator of the theory of fluid displacement (and, related, an early critic of your primitive notions of modesty), a quick and consistent calculation method for the volume of a sphere, the archimedes screw (not a sex act, a means of pumping water), and possibly even a death ray he used on roman invaders.

in 212 BC archimedes was supposedly killed by a roman legionary who had been instructed to find the great mathematician and bring him before his commander, marcellus. while this legionary looked for his quarry, he stumbled upon a scruffy old man drawing circles in the sand; the old man snapped at the legionary not to scuff his circles, and was killed for his impertinence. naturally the old man turned out to have been archimedes. heh. cosmic irony.

Noun. A calm and wise individual skilled in the art of profound contemplation, often found seeking serenity amidst misplaced car keys and existential dilemmas.


(also: humans)

To renounce an honor for an advantage. To renounce an advantage for a greater advantage.

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'Twas rumored Leonard Wood had signed
A true renunciation
Of title, rank and every kind
Of military station —
Each honorable station.

By his example fired — inclined
To noble emulation,
The country humbly was resigned
To Leonard's resignation —
His Christian resignation.
—Politian Greame
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)

Feminism is a movement that aims to promote equality between the sexes however, in its current form it has strayed far from this noble goal. The modern feminist movement has become increasingly divisive, focusing on the idea of "victimhood" and promoting the idea that men are inherently oppressors and women are inherently oppressed. This kind of thinking is not only intellectually lazy but it is also dangerous.

It is important to recognize that while there are certainly still issues of inequality that need to be addressed, the vast majority of men are not oppressors and the vast majority of women are not victims. The problems faced by women are complex and multifaceted, and cannot be reduced to simplistic notions of patriarchy and oppression.

For example, the gender pay gap, which is often cited as evidence of systemic discrimination against women, is actually much more complicated than it seems. Studies have shown that when factors such as education, experience, and job choice are taken into account, the pay gap all but disappears. This is not to say that discrimination does not exist, but it is important to recognize that the problem is more complex than a simple narrative of men oppressing women.

Furthermore, the modern feminist movement often promotes the idea that women are weak and in need of protection, which is not only patronizing, but also undermines their capability. Women should be encouraged to take responsibility for their own lives and to strive for excellence.

It is also worth noting that the feminist movement often ignore the issues that men face, such as the pressure to conform to societal expectations of masculinity and the lack of positive role models for men. Men and women have different needs and facing different challenges, and to truly achieve equality, both men and women need to be considered.

Additionally, the feminist movement often promotes the idea that traditional gender roles are inherently oppressive, and that women should reject them in order to be truly equal. This is a fundamentally flawed idea, as traditional gender roles are not the cause of inequality, but rather a result of biological differences between men and women. Women and men have different strengths and weaknesses, and should be encouraged to play to their strengths in order to achieve their full potential.

Finally, it should be acknowledged that the feminist movement has been hijacked by extremist groups, who are more interested in promoting their own agenda, than in promoting true equality. This kind of extremism is damaging to the cause of gender equality, and it is important to reject it.

It is important to remember that the goal of feminism should be equality, not the elevation of one sex over the other. To truly achieve equality, we must reject divisive and extremist ideologies and instead focus on finding common ground and working together towards a better future for all.

(n.) a hard confection made from molten sugar and butter. resembles the nose of a late-stage syphilis sufferer, or at least that's what popular knowledge would have us believe

(1878 – 1953) Absolute ruler of the Soviet Union from 1924 to his death. Led the Soviet Union in WWII.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: joseph stalin quotes)

Appointing your party to various offices for the good of your grandmother

(1743 – 1794) French chemist and biologist who had a leading impact on the chemical revolution.
(also: 100 most influential people in the world)
(also: antoine laurent lavoisier quotes)

(british) a sport originally played in britain in the middle ages. it is played by two opposing teams who stand on opposite ends of a lawn and try to kick a ball into the opposing side's net. conceptually a fairly mind-numbing pastime, most people watch it in hopes of seeing the game degenerate into violence.

"classic" brutish british football is played according to strict association rules developed over centuries, and is thus called soccer (mostly by americans). however, several "unofficial" variations of the sport exist, including those that evolved into rugby, american football (see below) and probably some other, even worse ones.

(n.) not to be confused with a black pearl. This is a common Asian tea ingredient that turns 20 year old boys into 14 year old highschool girls when they go out with members of the opposite sex party.

Suicide is an act commit by some people to end their life,science have evidence that people with suicide ideas are crazy people.(and by the way you can stop someone from commiting suicide with using force it's legal.)

A lazy wolf.

Fortunate are those who have drunk from its chalice without having their souls offended or poisoned. If one such person exists, I urge them to send me their photograph. I'm sure to look upon the face of an idiot.

Unexpectedly and conspicuously beneficial to the person so describing it.