The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Walking about. Relating to the philosophy of Aristotle, who, while expounding it, moved from place to place in order to avoid his pupils' objections. A needless precaution — they knew no more of the matter than he.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
An imaginary state or quality distinguished from the actual by an element known as excellence; an attribute of the critic.
The editor of an English magazine having received a letter pointing out the erroneous nature of his views and style, and signed "Perfection," promptly wrote at the foot of the letter: "I don't agree with you," and mailed it to Matthew Arnold.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The editor of an English magazine having received a letter pointing out the erroneous nature of his views and style, and signed "Perfection," promptly wrote at the foot of the letter: "I don't agree with you," and mailed it to Matthew Arnold.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The loss of one's soul; also the place in which it can be found.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Undergoing or awaiting punishment.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The known part of the route from an arboreal ancestor with a swim bladder to an urban descendant with a cigarette.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The variable (and audible) part of the roadway for an automobile.
(also: poor)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: poor)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
O, what's the loud uproar assailing
Mine ears without cease?
'Tis the voice of the hopeful, all-hailing
The horrors of peace.
Ah, Peace Universal; they woo it —
Would marry it, too.
If only they knew how to do it
'Twere easy to do.
They're working by night and by day
On their problem, like moles.
Have mercy, O Heaven, I pray,
On their meddlesome souls!
—Ro Amil
(also: war)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
O, what's the loud uproar assailing
Mine ears without cease?
'Tis the voice of the hopeful, all-hailing
The horrors of peace.
Ah, Peace Universal; they woo it —
Would marry it, too.
If only they knew how to do it
'Twere easy to do.
They're working by night and by day
On their problem, like moles.
Have mercy, O Heaven, I pray,
On their meddlesome souls!
—Ro Amil
(also: war)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first.
(also: patriot)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first.
(also: patriot)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A device for promoting dejection. Gentle exercise for intellectual debility.
(also: time)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: time)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
That part of Eternity with some small fraction of which we have a slight and regrettable acquaintance. A moving line called the Present parts it from an imaginary period known as the Future. These two grand divisions of Eternity, of which the one is continually effacing the other, are entirely unlike. The one is dark with sorrow and disappointment, the other bright with prosperity and joy. The Past is the region of sobs, the Future is the realm of song. In the one crouches Memory, clad in sackcloth and ashes, mumbling penitential prayer; in the sunshine of the other Hope flies with a free wing, beckoning to temples of success and bowers of ease. Yet the Past is the Future of yesterday, the Future is the Past of to-morrow. They are one — the knowledge and the dream.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A document treacherously inflicted upon a citizen going abroad, exposing him as an alien and pointing him out for special reprobation and outrage.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
An adherent without sense.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A filial coup de grâce whereby one is released from the lingering torments of paternity.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
To remit a penalty and restore to a life of crime. To add to the lure of crime the temptation of ingratitude.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
A play in which the story is told without violence to the language. The least disagreeable form of dramatic action.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
The doctrine that everything is God, in contradistinction to the doctrine that God is everything.
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
(also: The Devil's Dictionary)
sign-up or face the consequences!
“"observers" must obey the call.”
join