confessions

trustycoffeemug

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  1. total entries 600
  2. follower 4
  3. score 41202

kidney

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a pair of organs that are somewhere in the backish region or thereabouts, probably slightly above the buttocks

like a slightly disgusting reservoir, the kidney filters toxins out of the bloodstream and directs them to the bladder so that they may be appropriately vented somewhere discreet like the neighbor's fence

dandy

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a man who pays unusual and excessive attention to the quality and appearance of the clothing he wears; a man fixated on style and fashion.

often mocked, but sometimes also feared. a man in tights will nearly always fall into this category.

cemetery

trustycoffeemug
(n.) an outdoor party venue where attendees generally wear their best clothes; although quiet, they remain very popular. most people will visit at least once a lifetime and even so many are simply dying to get in.

jack-o'-lantern

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a traditional form of halloween decoration consisting of a vegetable that has been mutilated and disemboweled. a candle is then placed inside the hollowed-out specimen so that the baleful light may evoke the visage of a hideous, grinning face, to be presented on one's doorstep on halloween night.

the real horror comes days after that when you have to clean it up.

(also: pumpkin)

pumpkin spice

trustycoffeemug
a flavoring that is nigh omnipresent on food products in the western world between late summer and autumn. presumably there is some deep ritualistic significance behind this custom, though it remains doggedly beyond the understanding of our finest minds

originally used on pumpkins, a variety of pumpkin spiced watermelon

plane

trustycoffeemug
(n.) a winged vehicle designed to travel through the air, fulfilling mankind's most frivolous dream. heap big devil bird.

a convenient way of reaching destinations expeditiously, and of delivering bombs to hiroshima.

may or may not contain snakes

the finger

trustycoffeemug
a wonderfully obscene and versatile hand gesture consisting of a balled fist save for one raised middle finger, knuckles facing the target of your ire.

symbolically represents a visiting ambassador from a faraway land rich in all the ***loves*** I don't give.

finger

trustycoffeemug
(n.) the extremities on the end of one's hand, usually existing in bunches of four plus an additional one who sort of does his own thing (the thumb). if your brain is working correctly you can make them curl up in order to grab things.

for the obscene hand gesture, see the finger. for the fillets of breaded chicken meat, see chicken finger. for the first really good james bond movie, see goldfinger. for other things called fingers go somewhere else. leave me alone.
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